Photography and Poetry: What if it Were You

The Vintage Lake with Empty Bench February 2016

He’s frustrated
He’s not sure how to handle it.

He lashes out
He says unkind words
He insults
He teases.

He’s not sure how to handle it
He’s frustrated.

The mom tells the son
that it is okay to
have these feelings.
Feeling angry, sad,
frustrated is okay.
These feelings are valid
simply because he has them.

He does not understand
why the sister behaves
the way she does.
Does not understand
the inflexibility.
Does not understand
the fears she harbors.
Does not understand
the massive and, at times,
violent melt downs.
Does not understand
the anxiety that
can lead to a melt down.

He becomes critical
and desires something
be done about the situation.
He feels the mom blames
the missing chromosomes
for the sisters behavior.
He feels that the mom blames
him for being angry and upset.

The mom lets him know
that it is okay for
him to be feeling this way
He is not wrong for
feeling frustrated
and angry.

The mom only asks him
to think about this …

What if you were her?
What if …

You could not speak clearly so that others understood you?
You were in near constant pain almost every single day?
You had balance issues and fell constantly?
You were much, much shorter than your peers?
You were much, much shorter than your YOUNGER sibling?
Your body did not cooperate with accomplishing tasks?
You could not easily use a spoon or butter knife?
You could not drink from a glass without a straw?
You could not easily brush or floss your teeth?
You were the one without lip closure?
You were the one with hand tremors?
You were the one with fine motor skill difficulties?
You were riddled with anxiety and irrational fears?
You were the one with an entire section of your 18th chromosome missing?

What if this were you
and not the other?

The mom was not telling him
that these difficulties
are excuses for being
unkind to others.

Simply to ponder
what one’s life would
be like if all that is
easy and simple vanished …

Ponder if it all became
difficult and a struggle …

Simply ponder …

The mom let him know he
could continue to feel
and believe what he chooses.

The mom will not force
her opinions of
the situation upon him.

The mom simply asks him to ponder.

And the mom will ponder
what it would be like
if she were the sibling
to the one …

The mom simply asks him to ponder.

And they shall ponder.

-©2017, Camilla Downs

Empathy has within it the seed to change the world. The more of us that plant and cultivate this seed, the more the world will shift towards peace. -Camilla Downs

I posted this on facebook first and the following are my responses to friends comments:

I can literally feel my heart breaking when Thomas and Lillian are arguing and being unkind to one another and that pours through into these writings.

I can be quite harsh with myself about my parenting skills; thinking I screw it up more than I have it heart aligned.

These are times that journal writing proves so helpful as I remind myself that I’m doing the best I can with where I’m at and give myself a good reminder to love myself. No matter what. Alongside that is when dear friends give me a good reminding too …

It was not my intent to cause anyone to feel less or unvalidated. We are all traveling a unique path; yet, with many, many similarities.

When I am in an unawakened state, I harbor deep worry that Thomas and Lillian will not choose to move towards a relationship of harmony and loving kindness. It breaks my heart to feel the current energies of dislike they have for one another.

Empathy has within it the seed to change the world. The more of us that plant and cultivate this seed, the more the world will shift towards peace.

Blessings,
Camilla
See It. Share It. BE IT … Spread Love Everywhere You Go!

Amazing news! My 16 year old daughter, Lillian Darnell’s debut book, “Where Would You Fly and Other Magical Stories” is published. Learn more and order here

Wonderfully exciting news! My 12 year old son, Thomas Darnell‘s book, Biggest Little Photographer is published. Be inspired! Learn more and order here.

Latest Articles:
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Anything is Possible: An Interview With the Author of On Top of the World

Screen Shot 2018-04-23 at 8.50.23 AM

Welcome everyone to a very special interview with Lorie Stevenson, author of On Top of the World. Here’s a bit about the book:

Missy is a little girl with a big dream: she wants to see the world from higher up.

Her father is an airline pilot. He gets to see the world from higher up all the time. But, Missy needs a wheelchair to go everywhere. How could she see the world like her dad does?

Then one day, Missy and her family go to the circus and her dream changes a bit—maybe she could see the world from up high. On top of a horse Missy could feel on top of the world! And people would need to look UP into her big blue eyes instead of down at the top of her head. Eye-to-eye, that would make Missy very happy.

So come, let’s see if Missy does find her dream!

Camilla: What is On Top of the World about and what does it help teach?

Lorie: My book is about a little girl who longs to see things from above.. like her Dad, a pilot, is able to do. But I also hope there is a deeper thought process portrayed here. Because she is in a wheelchair.. people “look down on her”. And do not always come down to her level to talk eye-to-eye.

I believe we should always look each other in the eye when conversing. That is how you know the other person is paying attention and really listening to what you have to say. This, in turn, grants you a feeling of inclusion and builds your self-confidence. As a mother, I remember the first time a doctor addressed my daughter directly, instead of me. It was a very enlightening and positive feeling!!

Camilla: What inspired you to write this children’s book?

Lorie: My original inspiration to write this story came on a long car trip. I was trying to explain how horseback riding makes me feel. At one with nature, with one of the most incredible animals created. I find it builds my self-confidence and sense of teamwork as well as perhaps a bit of personal power and of course passion and respect for the equine race who have such huge hearts.

Camilla: What is the main message readers are taking away from the book?

Lorie: The main message I hope people will take away with them after reading my book or having it read to them is, of course, that dreams really can come true. If you wish hard enough .. anything IS possible. And do not look down on others … reach out to them at their level. Everyone wants to be seen and heard and valued.

Camilla: What final words would you like to share?

Lorie: And a final message: Hippotherapy is so advantageous for so many in a myriad of ways. Please support Therapeutic Riding programs in any way you can. It may be a donation for a fundraising auction. It may be financial help to support these wonderful animals. It may be donating your used tack. Or donating your time … there is always a need for more volunteers!

And do not be afraid of a horse because of its size and relative power. Therapeutic animals are well trained and usually older, experienced and kind. They have huge hearts that nurture humans. Hippotherapy has been proven to help all kinds of disabilities! Promote love for animals.. they depend on us so that we can depend on them.

On Top of the World Shelby April 2018

Proud Daughter, Shelby!

Camilla: Tell us a bit about yourself.

Lorie: Put on first pony at 18 months by paternal grandmother. Fell in love!

Sang all the way home , downhill, from elementary school every day … composing as I walked. (It was actually safe to walk to and from school, mostly alone, in those days!)
Mum said she could hear me a couple of blocks away …. yes, loud back then, too.

Loved to write poetry ( lyrics in my mind …)

In the 70’s I used to write personal poems for some of my coworkers to give as gifts to family members! I interviewed them, then wrote a sonnet. Charged $10 or $20 .. Lol!

I love to fly!! Travel is high on my list and Shelby is a great partner in crime for those adventures! I love dogs and horses and words! I love to sing and am a wacky whistler!!

Am finally trying to achieve a name for myself with my writing and so for my 60th birthday, I self-published a book that I originally wrote almost 20 years ago.

So far, so good. Reviews have been favourable. And 2 people have texted me photos of their little daughters loving my book! So I am feeling fairly content these days and a bit more self-confident too. Cheers!!! (I do love my Pinot Grigio too …)

On Top of the World Laurie Cheers April 2018

With On Top of the World, Lorie Stevenson has achieved her dream of publishing a book with a message. Lorie has long had a passion for writing and horses. She now resides in Victoria, British Columbia with her daughter, Shelby, who was born with a very rare chromosomal condition known as Tetrasomy 18p. Having grown up riding horses herself, Lorie introduced Shelby to weekly therapeutic riding lessons to help her balance and strengthen her back. Now Lorie and Shelby enjoy riding lessons together—on top of the world!

Screen Shot 2018-04-23 at 8.50.38 AM

You can learn more and purchase On Top of the World by going HERE.

*This interview contains Amazon affiliate links.

Blessings,
Camilla
See It. Share It. BE IT … Spread Love Everywhere You Go!

Amazing news! My 16 year old daughter, Lillian Darnell’s debut book, “Where Would You Fly and Other Magical Stories” is published. Learn more and order here

Wonderfully exciting news! My 12 year old son, Thomas Darnell‘s book, Biggest Little Photographer is published. Be inspired! Learn more and order here.

Latest Articles:
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Can a Book Be Published With Little to No Money – Part Three

This is a continuation post and the last of the series.

Below is an excerpt from Part One:

” …. so I’m going to get to the bottom line first thing. And those who are interested about the entire story can read further. Lillian’s book was published with absolutely no money paid out to anyone for the creation of the book. That’s it!

Now, there was a bit of money paid for the ISBN bar code graphic (about $20), for envelopes to mail the books once received (about $15), and for two proof copies of the book (about $15 each which included shipping).

I want to reiterate that I am not sharing this to brag or gloat. That is not my nature. I am sharing this to give hope, to share …… “

Go here to read the previous post if you missed it ..

Can a Book Be Published With Little to No Money – Part One

Below is an excerpt from Part Two:

” …. Thomas and I considered our options between using an online self-publishing site and using a local Reno publisher/printer. We made a chart listing the costs and pros and cons. We had a meeting with the local publisher. After the meeting we decided to go with the local company. I would do as much as possible and they would help out minimally.

Once we decided to go with the local publisher, I began ….”

Go here to read the rest if you missed it …

Can a Book Be Published With Little to No Money – Part Two

“D iz for Different – One Woman’s Journey to Acceptance” was written by me in 2011 and published in 2012. There’s an interesting story on how the book came to be written so if you’d like to read that story go here …

Purging, Weight Loss, and Writing a Book

I wrote the bulk of the book in about three months. When I began writing I had no idea how it would get from the initial writing into a published book. Yet, I did not let that stop me from writing. I knew I was to write, so I wrote. Every morning I got up 30 minutes earlier than I had been, sat outside on the patio, with an expansive view of majestic Mount Rose, and wrote for thirty minutes to an hour every day.

It was either during writing the book or just after I had finished that I began researching how to self-publish one’s book. I decided to use Amazon’s self-publishing arm, CreateSpace. Having no money to invest in this book, was a major factor in choosing this option.

I found friends who were willing to be test readers and editors. I had an idea of what I wanted for the cover; yet, during that same time came across artwork that I fell in love with. The art is created by a young man, D.J. Svoboda, with autism who I had been connected with through a mutual Chromosome 18 friend. I was inspired to ask D.J. if he would like his artwork on the cover of my book. He excitedly answered back with a resounding “Yes”! Another friend designed the initial cover for me at no charge.

D iz for Different Books Shipment of 5 Received 1.11.18

With the cover designed and the book having been reviewed by several others, I dove into Createspace to attempt figuring out how to make what I had into a book! I began to stumble and wasn’t sure how to proceed as it seemed I needed to have Word. I have been an Apple Mac user since about 2000 and have not used Microsoft products since then.

At about the same time, I received a phone call or email from Diana Michelotti to let me know that she is D.J’s manager and wanted to talk about the use of his art on the cover of the book. I contacted Diana and she wanted me to send a few chapters of the book for her review and approval for D.J.’s art.

Not too long after I sent the chapters to Diana for review, I heard back from her that she loved what I had sent and was deeply moved by the content. She wondered who I was going to have edit the book and who would be creating the layout of the book. I told her that I was going to do it myself; that I was stuck for the moment, yet, I would figure it out.

I explained that I had absolutely no money to pay someone for their services. She responded with, “I will do this for you. And, I will not charge you. This is what I do for a living and I want to help you.” She further stated that she believed in the message I was sharing and wanted to help get the book created.

Free Hugs and Smiles Thomas and Camilla at D iz for Different Table 2013

So began the journey of working with Diana. It was a lengthy process as there was much more editing needed than I had anticipated. It was the greatest lesson in patience that I think I have ever experienced. And, I did not handle it in the highest and best way possible, in my opinion.

This was at the very beginning of the huge shift I was beginning to make. A shift of living a spiritually based life; rather than whatever you would call I had been living. I did not see being patient as a lesson at that time. I saw it as an annoyance, something I could not control, and it was bringing forth anxiety and anger. I can see it all clearly now and definitely process these events differently now.

“What a blessing and privilege it has been to work with Camilla Downs and be a part of the creation of ‘D iz for Different.’

Like a bird leaving its nest for the first time – I hope this book spreads its wings, takes flight and reaches those who need to hear Camilla’s inspiring story.” – Diana Michelotti

Less than a year after I began writing it, the book was finally finished and published in May 2012.  And, it was written, created, and published with no money. It was a huge learning experience being the first time I had done anything like this.

Another aspect of the book that came together in perfect synchronicity were the review blurbs. I met the Ziglar family at a conference in 2010 and had kept in touch with Zig Ziglar’s daughter and grand-daughter. When the time came, I asked Julie Ziglar Norman if she would like to write a review blurb. She loved the book and agreed!

A connection I had made through a local networking group approached me one night to say she had been working with someone she thought I should connect with. She connected us via email and after he emailed me back I went to his website only to discover that this person is Jim Stovall!! Author of The Ultimate Gift which was also made into a movie. He was happy to offer a review blurb. I LOVE the movie, by the way!!

There was much I did not include in the book. Not to mention that my writing has evolved since this book and has a completely different flavor now. Don’t get me wrong. I love the book and it’s contents. I still have faith in what I wrote; I can simply see the difference now. The content is mind and brain heavy and not so much from the heart. I barely skimmed the surface of my essence with the book and, in fact, some of my views have shifted a bit since its writing. And, as stated earlier, I have become deeply spiritual since ‘D iz for Different’ was birthed into a published book.

I see it all as part of the process and part of my journey. We all change throughout our lives. Some more so than others. This book was supposed to be “light” and to only skim the surface. It was the toe dip into the author’s ocean for me. A toe dip to test the waters. I am thankful it was met with such a warm reception and enthusiasm.

There is much I wanted to say in the book, that I did not say for fear of offending or turning others away. Fear. What a lesson it has to teach us. I no longer have this fear as one could most likely surmise by reading the writings that currently come forth. Fear is simply love going in the opposite direction and I have tipped the scales so that fear and love have embraced in an ecstatic burst of love creation through writing.

I vow to write. I vow to listen for what to write. I vow to write even if no one reads what is written. I vow to write even if it turns some away. I vow to write for the writing is the food that feeds my soul. I vow to write until the day I am no longer inhabiting this beautiful Earth. I vow to write.

Well, I had not intended all of this to come forth. Yet, there it is. In all it’s grace and glory! Once it turns on, I cannot turn it off until it’s finished!

Back to the book …. The book reached #2 in the Self-Help Category and #1 in Special Needs Parenting on Amazon. The last I checked it had a 4 and 1/2 star rating on Amazon. Sales have absolutely fallen flat and I no longer market the book. In 2013, I let shame and fear that the book was no good take over and I abandoned further marketing.

‘D iz for Different’ is about to receive a facelift by way of a new cover as this cover seems to no longer be in sync with my heart. I love and adore D.J. and this does not speak less of his beautiful art, nor does it speak less of the hard work Diana put into it. This is all about me and what my heart dictates.

So … YES! A book can be published with no money!!

And stay tuned for the updated cover!!

And, stay tuned for the next books to be published. There will be another book coming near the end of this year or beginning of 2019.

Blessings,
Camilla
See It. Share It. BE IT … Spread Love Everywhere You Go!

Amazing news! My 16 year old daughter, Lillian Darnell’s debut book, “Where Would You Fly and Other Magical Stories” is published. Learn more and order here

Wonderfully exciting news! My 12 year old son, Thomas Darnell‘s book, Biggest Little Photographer is published. Be inspired! Learn more and order here.

Latest Articles:
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Can a Book Be Published With Little to No Money – Part One

I recently read a post in a writing group from someone about envy arising in some members when it is announced that other members finally have a published book! The writer of the post was not being unkind. She simply wished to share why envy is not called for in this situation.

While I don’t agree with the reason indicated, I do agree that it’s in our best interest to catch the feelings of envy and jealousy when they arise. Notice the feeling. Physically feel it and release it. And, by the way, I am not immune to having these feelings either. If they do sneak up, I try my best to do what I previously describe above.

And, when you feel ready, replace it with joy and gratitude for the abundance of the world and celebrate the success with this person. As just because they have accomplished this does not mean it is less likely that you will, it does not take away from your efforts at doing the same. Instead of “Why Him? or Why Her”, think “Why Not Me?” …

On the opposite end of envy and jealousy is inspiration and the knowing that you too can accomplish that which you desire.

As long as you believe it and you believe you are worthy of birthing it to life. Those who are meant to assist will appear.

The writer of the post concluded that the reason that these individuals are published is because they had the money to do it. She is a published author of several books so was speaking from her experience. Her thoughts were that if you have enough money, a publisher will publish the book as long as it fits their criteria and that the publisher doesn’t care if it’s good or not; as long as you pay them.

She further indicated that family and friends will request free books and the author is lucky to receive 10 free books from the publisher and that there are those who become upset when referred to amazon to purchase the book. I do not relay this to contest or argue as that’s not my nature. I fully understand that this may be the experience of some, perhaps many. I only want to present that there is another way and there are those with a different experience.

I’d like to share my experience now that I’ve published three books. Oh my gosh! I’ve published three books! Wahooo!!! Let’s celebrate!! ….

I’ll begin with the latest. My 16 year old daughter, Lillian’s, book – “Where Would You Fly and Other Magical Stories”.

Matte v Glossy Where Would You Fly Book January 2018

This will be quite lengthy, so I’m going to get to the bottom line first thing. And those who are interested about the entire story can read further. Lillian’s book was published with absolutely no money paid out to anyone for the creation of the book. That’s it!

Now, there was a bit of money paid for the ISBN bar code graphic (about $20), for envelopes to mail the books once received (about $15), and for two proof copies of the book (about $15 each which included shipping).

I want to reiterate that I am not sharing this to brag or gloat. That is not my nature. I am sharing this to give hope, to share light with others who may feel that which they believe they are supposed to share with others may never come to fruition. Please don’t give up. If you know you are supposed to share something, begin to take steps. Start where you are. Don’t let the “How” of something five steps away stop you from taking the first step.

Lillian and I began writing stories together when she was four-years-old as I felt then that I was supposed to write and she wanted to write too! Lillian has a chromosome deletion that affects 1 in 56,000 people (named 18p-).

Where Would You Fly Updated Cover 9.2017

One of the main ways it manifests is her ability to articulate letters and words. She is largely unintelligible when she speaks. If you’re interested in learning more about Lillian you can go here on my blog and visit her blog here. To learn more about her book go here.

Shortly after we wrote a few stories together she began writing her own stories, poems, and songs. I made it clear that one day we would write a book together. At 16-years-old she is now a published author!

I didn’t know how I was going to make it happen. Yet, I have this quirky thing about me where I do not let the how stop me. I simply get started with where I am and with what I have.

In late Spring 2016 I began sifting through Lillian’s blog posts and handwritten stories. I remembered that years ago a fellow chromosome 18 mom had let me know she was a graphic designer. At the time I was working on websites and social media for businesses so that’s how her message came about.

Camilla and Lillian with Where Would You Fly Book 12.22.17

I messaged Kate and asked how much she would charge to create the book cover and if she was able to help layout the book using Amazon’s createspace (Amazon’s self-publishing arm). I sent this message knowing full well I did not have the money to pay, yet, again, I do not let that ever stop me. I ask. I continue moving forward. I figured if I knew how much she charged, I would have a number to keep in mind for accruing.

Kate messaged that she would help us for no charge. So began the journey of bringing the book to life. I spent hours and hours and hours pulling together the stories, organizing them, and editing them. Kate spent hours and hours and hours creating the cover and having a hell of a time maneuvering through createspace.

If you perform a search for createspace and reviews/opinions, you’ll see what I mean!! Kate was a trooper. She would not give up! The interior would be perfect on her end. Then, after uploading to createspace, it would go all wonky. Random spaces and markings in the book. It was no picnic for her!!

I performed the editing of the book with Thomas, my 12-year-old, as an assistant editor. I have a dear junior high school friend who edited the Forward and About Author section for me (since I wrote those, I needed someone else to edit).

I already had an ISBN as I purchased a block of ten back in 2006 or 2007 as I knew in my heart they would be needed. We’ve used four now!! I handled contacting the library of congress for the LCCN. I procured the bar code graphic.

I researched and created the copyright page information and the Publisher’s Cataloging-in-Publication data; including the dewey decimal number classification. I also requested and received book endorsements. I will be creating the book trailer, the press release, and handling the marketing, and setting up book signings.

I have not had any family member or friend ask to receive a book for free. I, however, have offered it in trade to a few people as I didn’t have the money to pay for services (haircut, mandala class for Lillian).

That goes for Thomas’ book and my book too. No one ever asked for a free book. However, I did gift and trade some books. I am also not shy of telling others that our family earns more money when the book is purchased directly from us as opposed to purchasing on Amazon.

However, we are happy whichever way people choose to purchase. The bottom line is it doesn’t matter where they purchase it. Yet, they may never know or understand how it works if I don’t share the information.

I will continue with Thomas’ book and in a second post and my book in a third post as this one has gotten way too long!! Stay tuned …. Part two to follow next week. Go here to read Part two …

Can a Book Be Published With Little to No Money – Part Two

Blessings,
Camilla
See It. Share It. BE IT … Spread Love Everywhere You Go!

Amazing news! My 16 year old daughter, Lillian Darnell’s debut book, “Where Would You Fly and Other Magical Stories” is published. Learn more and order here

Wonderfully exciting news! My 12 year old son, Thomas Darnell‘s book, Biggest Little Photographer is published. Be inspired! Learn more and order here.

Latest Articles:
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Latest News: Where Would You Fly and Other Magical Stories – Published

Camilla and Lillian with Where Would You Fly Book 12.22.17

A project that began in June 2017, is now complete!

Lillian Darnell, my 16 year old special needs daughter, is now a published author! January 2018 is the official publication date and we are awaiting the arrival of the first shipment of books!

Where Would You Fly Updated Cover 9.2017

When I began I did not know how it would move from the idea stage to the published book that it is today. As with other projects I undertake, I just began and let it unfold organically. I am writing a blog post with more details which will publish this week or next.

I am working on the press release and book trailer now and we will let you know of the book launch date and book signings.

“Where Would You Fly and Other Magical Stories”

Welcome to the radiant imagination of Lillian Darnell, a wonderful and unique human being, the kind who comes around only once in every 56,000 births, as she is missing the short arm of her 18th chromosome.

Leave this reality behind and enter enchanted lands awash in mysteries, happy endings, adventures, and inspiration. Come within and discover heartwarming and beautiful tales, woven with love and magic, brought forth from the imagination of a young woman with a different perspective. Lose yourself in wondrous adventures as you follow courageous, enchanting characters, kind animals and plant life, and graceful Mother Nature.

The delightful tales, legends, and poems within these pages were written by Lillian Darnell between the ages of four and fifteen. The stories and poems are mostly edited for spelling and grammar, yet the bulk of the stories remain as she originally wrote and published them to include a few grammatical errors and made up words.

Will a girls dream of becoming a princess come true?
How can sad, mischievous, fearful animals help humans feel emotions?
How did the world come to have color?

“You can’t help but feel happy and be inspired while reading this book. Lillian’s stories jump straight out of her heart and onto the pages in an authentic, innocent, and loving way. The world needs more positivity and happiness and her stories are bursting with both. Thank you Lillian!” -G. Brian Benson – Award-winning and best-selling author, actor and TEDx speaker.

“Let your imagination be taken away with Lillian Darnell’s writings and allow yourself to be transported to places where anything is possible with love, joy and a touch of inspiration. This collection is born from a young woman with a unique perspective on how our world could be – immerse yourself and come, see the world through Lillian’s eyes.” -Dr Veronica Wain – Award winning filmmaker, Academic, Author, Disability Advocate

“Although all of us who love fairies understand that children, with their vivid imaginations, are closer to magic than any of us, we all yearn to retain that childlike sense of wonder. Lillian Darnell’s writings are a welcome reminder of what is possible when you dream big, and accept no limitations.” – Grace Nuth, Senior Editor – Faerie Magazine

To order, please use this PayPal button or mail a check to: Camilla Downs, PO Box 19812, Reno, NV 89511. The cost with shipping is $19.00 (Only for our U.S. friends. Our Canadian and overseas friends can contact me at CamillaDowns @ gmail . com … )




Matte v Glossy Where Would You Fly Book January 2018

Blessings,
Camilla
See It. Share It. BE IT … Spread Love Everywhere You Go!

Amazing news! My 16 year old daughter, Lillian Darnell’s debut book, “Where Would You Fly and Other Magical Stories” is published. Learn more and order here

Wonderfully exciting news! My 12 year old son, Thomas Darnell‘s book, Biggest Little Photographer is published. Be inspired! Learn more and order here.

Latest Articles:
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Poetry: The Dance of Lillian – Happy 16th Birthday

Team TLC Sunset Walk Damonte Ranch Trail 6.18.17 #15

I’m a month late posting this, yet I promised Lillian that I would write a post dedicated to her …. xoxo

The Dance of Lillian

She came into this world
with her own agenda.
She came missing the short
arm of chromosome number 18.

Never mind what they
thought about how
they would parent her.

They would quickly
learn no parenting
manual existed for
the lessons she was
to bring with her
through this incarnation.

She delivered the
gift of shattered
expectations early
in her Earth life
as Lillian.

She had chosen
as a mom someone
who had many uncomfortable
lessons to learn.

Patience was to
be another of the
lessons she brought
with the tiny little
body she inhabited.

She was not done yet.
The next gift delivered
flowed into their
lives as a pure
cold stream runs
through the land.

That message.
Acceptance.

Acceptance of what life
had delivered and would
deliver.

This little bundle
that grew into a bright
shining light had
many lessons bundled within.

The next was to be
release of judgments.
Oh. That one stung
worse than an unwanted
bee sting on a warm
sunny day. A sting
that lingered for
years, resurfacing
at just the right moment.

This little bundle
who could be anything
but a bundle of joy.
A bundle of anger,
anxiety, violence, and
all kinds of negativity.

With this bundle
came the lesson of
living in the present
moments of life.
Being mindful and
learning the art
of mindfulness.

Responding to this one
from the present moments
of life instead of hurts
from the past. Oh. This
was one of the hardest
lessons yet.

This had nothing to do
with this little bundle,
now a blossoming teen.
As she may have come
into this world in all
her nakedness.

Yet, she contained in
the fibers of her very
being, a Divinely pure
mirror that served to reflect
to the one called Mom
the lesson that it
was she who needed
to go within, to
confront her past,
to feel what she had
not wanted to feel,
And release it.

This would be the Mom’s
lesson of learning how to
live in the present moments
of life and to embrace the
art of mindfulness.

Four pounds and five
ounces of life changing,
life altering, life correcting
joy arrived on the evening
of September 14 2001.

Gratitude does not
even begin to describe
what the Mom feels about
the tiny bundle and she
deciding to have these
roles in this life.

The blossoming teen
was the catalyst
to teaching the mom that
she had it all wrong.
She and all children
are our awakeners.
They are not to
be pushed to the side,
put in the corner,
talked down to,
treated harshly,
abused, controlled,
barked at with commands
and “because I said so”
ridiculousness.

They are to be
respected and
treated as equals.
They may inhabit tiny
little bodies when they
first arrive.

Yet, the souls within
these tiny precious bodies
have much to teach us.
She came in missing
the short arm of her
chromosome number 18.

The lesson that encompasses
all of the other lessons
she brought forth.

Different.

She taught the mom
that she was going to be
the one who lives life
differently.

Mom learned how to live
life from the heart,
trusting the whisperings
of the heart.

She, who now enters
her sixteenth orbit
around the sun in this
Lillian body.

Happy, Happy Birthday
YOU beautiful being.
Thank you for blessing me
and being my awakener.

I Love You,
Camilla
Your Earth Mom

*******************************************

In addition to this, I thought it would be fun to link to her birthday posts over on the Team TLC blog and past birthday posts!

Happy 16th Birthday to Lillian Plus Camilla and Lillian September 2017 Date Day

She Spread Her Wings …. And Flew – Happy 15th Birthday Lillian

Happy 14th Birthday Lillian

Happy Birthday Lillian … Camilla

Blessings,

Camilla
See It. Share It. BE IT … Spread Love Everywhere You Go!

Amazing news! My 16 year old daughter, Lillian Darnell’s debut book, “Where Would You Fly and Other Magical Stories” is arriving November 2017. Learn more and order here

Wonderfully exciting news! My 11 year old son, Thomas Darnell‘s book, Biggest Little Photographer is published. Be inspired! Learn more and order here.

Latest Articles:
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11 Ways to Help Team TLC With Attending the Chromosome 18 Conference

C18 Trip July 2016 #17

We need your help! Last minute fund raising for Team TLC’s attendance at the 2017 Chromosome 18 Family Conference in Naperville, Illinois from July 12th – July 15th.

Fortunately, we have a sponsor who has loaned us money for our airfare, registration, and hotel stay. And we have a wee bit from Thomas and Lillian fundraising since last year’s conference.

We just need to make sure we have enough for incidentals while there … food, transportation to and from the airport, and the special events lined up for siblings and self advocates.

If you are moved to help, here’s a list of our creations …. Go here to read the full post ….

Help Team TLC With Attending the 2017 Chromosome 18 Family Conference

Blessings,

Camilla
See It. Share It. BE IT … Spread Love Everywhere You Go!

Wonderfully exciting news! My 15 year old daughter, Lillian Darnell’s book, Where Would You Fly and Other Magickal Stories will arrive soon. Be ready to enjoy the magick! Learn more and pre-order here.

10 Most Popular Posts for 2016

thomas-and-camilla-at-odabe-round-dance-9-25-16-5

Top 10 Blog Posts With the Most Views (Culled only from 2016 blog posts)

  1. Dear Meltdown, Meet My Friend Mindfulness
  2. Biggest Little Photographer Arrives – We Did It
  3. Living in a Tiny Home Adventures – Four Months
  4. Photo a Day for 365 Days – Thomas’ One Year Anniversary
  5. The Power and Magic of Connected Parenting
  6. 2016 Chromosome 18 Conference – San Antonio
  7. A Rapturous Dance With Life
  8. The Biggest Little Photographer by Thomas Darnell
  9. The Tao of Letting GoLetting Go Burning Ceremony, and There is More Than One Way (These 3 blog posts had the same amount of views)
  10. A State of Pure Awareness

**LOVE OFFERING** If you find this content helpful, I invite you to toss a tip in the love offering bowl. With oceans of gratitude … Camilla ….

love-cards-in-a-basket-october-2016

Top 10 Blog Posts With the Most Views for 2016 (Culled from all blog posts)

  1. Olive Oil as Facial Cleanser and Moisturizer – Oil Cleansing Method
  2. Recipe: No Powdered Sugar Cream Cheese Frosting
  3. Oil Cleansing Method – Update
  4. 17 Easy and Free Ideas on How to Rejuvenate Yourself
  5. Taste the Wind
  6. Dear Meltdown: Meet My Friend Mindfulness
  7. Recipe: Almond Flour Cookies
  8. Living in a Tiny Home Adventures
  9. Biggest Little Photographer Arrives – We Did It
  10. Recipe: Chia Seed Pudding

Top 10 Blog Posts of All Time With the Most Views

  1. Olive Oil as Facial Cleanser and Moisturizer – Oil Cleansing Method
  2. Recipe: Almond Flour Cookies
  3. Recipe: No Powdered Sugar Cream Cheese Frosting
  4. Help Team TLC With A Christmas Miracle
  5. 17 Easy and Free Ideas on How to Rejuvenate Yourself
  6. Oil Cleansing Method – Update
  7. I Wish I Wasn’t an 18p- Girl: Moment of Defeat – Take Two
  8. A Moment of Defeat
  9. Lillian and Being Different Presentation
  10. Creativity and Resourcefulness

Here’s to a 2017 in which we all go within to BE the change we wish to see in the world. BE Love, BE Peace, BE Compassion … We must BE this within in order to experience it without.

hearts-rock-sparks-2015

Blessings,

Camilla
See It. Share It. BE IT … Spread Love Everywhere You Go!

Wonderfully exciting news! My 10 year old son, Thomas Darnell‘s book, Biggest Little Photographer has arrived. Be inspired! Learn more and order here.

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A Rapturous Dance With Life

Lake Mead July 2016 #15

I did it. I did it. I did it.

I drove Team TLC 3,400 miles. Thursday, July 7, 2016 through Saturday, July 16, 2016 I drove 3,400 miles roundtrip to attend the Chromosome 18 Conference – Reno, Nevada to San Antonio, Texas .. 1,700 miles each way. A conference Thomas and Lillian have their hearts set on attending every year. We began attending the C18 Conference in 2009 when it was in Las Vegas and have gone every year since then.

We arrived home at midnight on Saturday, July 16th. I was kind of it out of all day Sunday. Then Monday, I woke up ready to go! By Monday afternoon, every muscle in my body ached and I felt weighted down. I was completely out of it for 4 full days. It took about 7 days before I felt like myself again.

Yet, I DID IT!! … xoxoxo

The plan was to leave at 5:00 am on Thursday, the 7th, so that I could drive as far as possible before darkness fell upon us. I am completely out of my comfort zone driving in the dark in unfamiliar places. I could not get to sleep the night before. I was worried and having anxiety about this trip due to finances, honestly, not even having enough to cover the trip.

Yet, I know how deeply important this conference is to Thomas and Lillian. Each for their own reasons. Thomas is the sibling to a sister who has a chromosome deletion. He has, and is, developing deep friendships with the other siblings his age and being mentored by the older siblings.

Lillian’s friends are her peers that she has connected with through this conference. She communicates with some of them all throughout the year. When one texts, blogs, post on Facebook and Instagram, emails, chats on Facebook, or uses skype; the spoken word is not needed.

In our world of verbal communication difficulties, social media has helped create a world that would not exist for Lillian and one where she has true friends. She has no local friends, yet she has friends all over the United States and the world … As far away as Tasmania, Australia.

C18 Trip July 2016 #17

After having about 3 hours sleep, I could not seem to get ready as I was overwhelmed with the enormity of this trip. I had an adult meltdown which delayed our departure. We were finally on our way at 7:00 am; two hours later than I had planned.

There was much excitement as we began the road trip. Lots of talking, observing the landscape, and silliness. About two hours into the morning, we lost cell phone service due to the rural area we traveled. We were without cell service for the next five or six hours until we reached Las Vegas. During this time, Thomas and Lillian became absorbed in reading books, magazines, or using their computers or phones.

Which left my mind much time to mess with me. I had stepped way out of my comfort zone with this trip. I had never driven this far, much less driven this far being the only one in charge of packing, driving, and navigating. Plus, we had never driven this far as a family. Our max road trip travel time was to the 2015 conference in Salt Lake City; which was about an 8 hour drive from Reno.

Thoughts of us being stranded due to car problems kept entering my mind like a dark storm cloud encroaching on the brightest of days. Thoughts of the lack of finances for this trip took their turn in the dance also. Not to be left out of the dance, thoughts of my insanity at attempting this cut into the dance too. All of this dance to be completed with the veil of anxiety and worry weaving in and out like a breeze blowing through the trees.

Thankfully, I am a student of mindfulness and emotional connection. And, since there was nothing else to do but sit and drive, I took this opportunity to put these practices to work. It was a rapturous dance between being mindful, connecting with emotions, and embracing the fear wanting to dance with me.

This trip proved to be challenging. I had not anticipated this dance with life in all of its flavors and colors in such a way to cause the suffering brought on by my thoughts. It was my goal to have this trip be a learning experience for me of not knowing, not planning, and just going. That’s certainly not for everyone.

Yet, I felt this was important for me. It’s a huge step out of my comfort zone. One step closer to trusting myself, trusting internal messages, and letting go of how it’s supposed to be done. As mentioned earlier, I’ve never driven this far alone … Much less alone with Thomas and Lillian. In addition to driving this far in Rosey, our 15 year old car, with dancing through this trip on less than a shoe string budget and letting go of worry that the string will hold tight.

I had moments where I was so extremely hot and exhausted I had visions of taking an ice bath and moments when I was so tired I was shaking and wondering what in the heck I was doing ….. Yet, I know. I may not know on the surface right now; but deep down, I know why I do what I do.

This was also a dance full of wonderful, bright moments. We shared inspiring comments and tons of love that furthered each one of us. Definitely some amazing growth for all of us happened! WOW!

We had a ball and laughed tons and enjoyed the beautiful landscape as we drove by it. Lillian was being so helpful and encouraging Thursday morning before we left.

Thomas was awesome and inspiring with his comments as we drove the two lane highways in the middle of nowhere in Nevada and Arizona. We saw a huge sign that read, “Nothing” and had a great laugh about that! Just after driving through Boulder City and Hoover dam, Thomas said, “I love it here.” He was so impressed with Lake Mead and said he wanted to live there.

Thomas went on to say that he always has deja vu and he has lived this life before. He said it all seems so familiar. He was incredibly inspired by the beauty that passed before our eyes. He also commented that he wants to buy land and simply let kids play on the land.

On the first day of driving, Lillian got sick to her stomach. We ended up spending about 30 minutes at a gas station bathroom and Thomas was extremely helpful. When we were looking for a place to stay and it kept getting darker and darker, I apologized to them as I had planned on stopping sooner. He said, “When you get a rock in your shoe, just shake it out.”

Rosey did a pretty good job. She had a wee bit of problems getting overheated but that was resolved with turning the air conditioner off while traveling up and down the mountainous areas. I had to give her some oil and coolant on the way there and some oil on the way back home. It’s scorching hot checking oil and fluids in over 100 degree weather!

With an hour and a half to go before we arrived in San Antonio, the epoxy glue I use for the driver side mirror had enough of the heat and was simply melting away! A couple of years ago I bumped the mirror backing out of a covered parking spot. So, for about 20 minutes I was holding the mirror until I could pull over. Bungee cord to the rescue!! Before we headed back home, the hotel gave me duct tape and that worked great for the ride back home.

I feel strongly guided to be establishing a new relationship with myself and the world and to model this for my kids, have them actively participate, and to help them know that there’s more to life and living than traditionally meets the eye.

I want them to never lose touch with their true self and to grow into adults knowing their given talents and having a solid and clear courage and conviction in sharing that talent with the world!

I continue to learn so much daily … About me, Thomas and Lillian, others and simply just living and dancing with life! xoxo

C18 Trip July 8 2016 #1

Blessings,
Camilla
See It. Share It. BE IT … Spread Love Everywhere You Go!

Wonderfully exciting news! We’ve completed the first book trailer for my 10 year old son’s, Thomas Darnell, upcoming book, Biggest Little Photographer. You can learn more and pre-order here.

Leaf at Sunset and Nature Box by Thomas

Thomas has been at it again creating items to contribute to getting us to the Chromosome 18 conference this July in San Antonio.

(Thomas’ older sister, Lillian, has 18p-. We plan on driving from Reno as this seems to be the least expensive option. If need be, we will take a tent and camp at campgrounds on the way down. Should take about three or four days. Thanks a million for taking a look at Thomas’ creations!)

I’m selling a painting of a leaf I made with a sunset in the background. (Added by my mom: It is made using recycled materials, acrylic paint, sealant, and made ready to hang.) Here’s a picture of it:

Thomas' Painting may 2016

I am asking for at least $20 (plus $5 for shipping if you are not local to Reno). I’ll leave the final price open to you. Please use this PayPal link and enter your amount.

I’m also selling a nature adventures set. Here’s a picture of it, along with ideas of what to do with it. (Mom added this: The possibilities of how to use this set is only limited by your imagination. You can also add your own pieces to it. Hand painted and decorated storage container made using recycled materials.)

nature set adventures idea 2

The above picture is of insects enjoying a campfire.

nature set ideas one

The above picture is of a game of bowling.

nature set ideas three

The above picture is of a soccer game.

nature set ideas four

The above is a photo of what’s included in the set.

photo 5 (78)

The above picture is the hand painted storage container made by recycling materials.

(Added by Mom: Please note this set is not intended for infants or toddlers or those who will place the items in their mouth.)

I am asking for at least $20 (plus $5 for shipping if you are not local to Reno). I’ll leave the final price open to you. Please use this PayPal link and enter your amount.

And last but not least, I’m selling prints of the mini-figure 365 Photo A Day series.

(Added by my mom: You will receive an 8 X 10 print on high quality paper. The photo series is currently being made into a book! These are being sold as part of pre-ordering the book. Tentatively titled Grand Adventures of the Biggest Little Photographer. Visit this link to learn more.)

If you have any questions, please comment here or email my mom at CamillaDowns @ gmail . com …

Blessings,

Camilla
See It. Share It. BE IT … Spread Love Everywhere You Go!

Did you know I wrote a book? It’s titled “D iz for Different – One Woman’s Journey to Acceptance” and you can read more about it here.

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