Throwback: The One Stillness

**THROWBACK POST** 

(I think this was written in 2017 – Originally submitted to a poetry website for consideration to be published.)


(Photo taken by me Spring 2019)

The One Stillness

And she began the walk,
The walk of only she,
breathing in, knowing she was breathing in
breathing out, knowing she was breathing out.

She listened in the stillness,
the sound of
the song birds
the beeping construction equipment
the roar of an airplane overhead
the creak and pop of the plastic fence
the screech of the shiny black vulture as he took flight
the echo of a distant cough across the wetland
the jingle of her dream catcher earrings in the breeze
the whir of the traffic in the distance.

She felt the soft breeze
Tenderly caress her cheeks,
hair lifting ever so gently.

She focused her eyes on the
vibrant luscious pink flower
and found her thoughts to be,

I am the vibrant luscious pink flower
swaying in the breeze
The flower is me.

She focused her eyes on the crisp green
blades of grass hosting
plump round droplets of water,

I am the crisp green blade of grass
hosting the water droplet,
the blade of grass is me.

I am the plump round water droplet
resting on the blade of grass,
the water droplet is me.

She focused her eyes on the
majestic black vulture

I am the majestic black vulture
resting on a rock
the vulture is me.

She focused her eyes on
the tall crooked tree,
laying her hands upon the cracked bark
smoothed by the winds of time.

I am the tree standing tall and crooked
the tree is me.

And she is,
and they are,
fulfilling this Divine Life.

And she ended the walk
The walk of One,
breathing in, knowing she was breathing in
breathing out, knowing she was breathing out. – ©2017 Camilla Downs

**July 2021 Update – This poem is in its “raw” state. A polished version is included in my latest book, a free-verse poetry memoir titled, Words of Alchemy. Go here to learn more … 

Words of Alchemy

Blessings,
Camilla
See It. Share It. BE IT … Spread Love Everywhere You Go!

“Words of Alchemy”, published December 2019, is a free-verse poetry memoir covering the last 6 years of my life. The poetry of nature, the poetry of healing, the poetry of appreciation, the poetry of love, in one beautiful book.

Amazing news! My 19 year old daughter, Lillian Darnell’s debut book, “Where Would You Fly and Other Magical Stories” was published January 2018. Learn more and order here

Wonderfully exciting news! My 15 year old son, Thomas Darnell‘s book, Biggest Little Photographer is published. Be inspired! Learn more and order here.

Throwback Post: Wild Dream With an Ocean Creature

**THROWBACK POST**

September 6 2018

Two Homes

She was in a house.
The two sided house.
One side beautiful and functional.
The other side old and not as functional.
The wall separating the two disappeared
And then the two were connected.
The house began to shake and rumble
And broke free from the foundation,
Landing in the river of Life.
Traveling the river rapids to freedom,
the house bobbed, weaved
shook and rattled, and
leaned left, then right.
Finally reaching open waters
the house broke apart and transformed into
the ocean creature it had always been.
Joyful to be home again
the ocean creature gracefully
swam into the depths of Home.

I had a dream last night with my friend, Kimberly Phipps Nichol, in it. She lived in a duplex and I think I was visiting her. I was checking out the duplex next door to them and it was completely weird. As were the people living there. It barely had a bathroom, with a stand up shower so small you couldn’t even move around in it. The tenants use one of Kimberly’s bathrooms, which was oddly open to their side as there was no wall separating the two. One of the bedrooms was absolutely huge and had a few stairs leading down to it from the kitchen. That’s also where the tiny bathroom/shower was. The kitchen was small and had a pink sink, I think.

Kimberly and I started dancing around for some reason and the house began to shake like there was an earthquake. The duplex neighbor asked us to stop but we didn’t think we were causing any harm and kept dancing and bouncing around. Then the house tore loose from the foundation and, I think, was in a river in rapids heading somewhere. At some point the house began to shake and rumble again and we knew we needed to get out. Somehow we did and we watched as the house became the creature of the ocean it had always been, and swam off into the ocean, loop da looping all the way.

Next thing I knew, we were back in Kimberly’s side of the duplex, getting ready for some type of gathering.

May 20 2021 Update: I’m still cleaning and purging the draft posts in my blog. I think I’ve been at it for a year or two now. I just had to share this one. This was such a wild dream that it inspired the above poem. I had completely forgotten about the dream and that I had written a poem about it. I hope it gave you a laugh or at least satisfied your weirdness quota for the day.

Blessings,
Camilla
See It. Share It. BE IT … Spread Love Everywhere You Go!

“Words of Alchemy”, published December 2019, is a free-verse poetry memoir covering the last 6 years of my life. The poetry of nature, the poetry of healing, the poetry of appreciation, the poetry of love, in one beautiful book.

Amazing news! My 19 year old daughter, Lillian Darnell’s debut book, “Where Would You Fly and Other Magical Stories” was published January 2018. Learn more and order here

Wonderfully exciting news! My 15 year old son, Thomas Darnell‘s book, Biggest Little Photographer is published. Be inspired! Learn more and order here.

Throwback Post: Between the Sweet Spot and the Heaviness

**THROWBACK TO 2017 OR 2018″

Between the Sweet Spot and the Heaviness

And lo the feelings
of being trapped
are strong.

Weighing on this body
as worries weigh
upon the mind.

No way out is seen
as the mind ricochets
from thought to thought.

Most having nothing
to do with what brings
forth the heaviness
and feelings of being trapped.

Like the shell in
the ocean,
attention is focused
on one thought
until tossed
to another and
yet another
with the movement
of the ocean.
Never BEing still.

Thoughts of wanting to be
somewhere one is not.
Always thoughts of how
one gets passed this
moment – how one
survives this moment.

The moment will come.
There is no stopping it.
It arrives just
as the moment
before arrived and
the moment after arrives.

Just as the shell
in the ocean is
tossed to and fro
one feels tossed
to and fro by life.

Not knowing which
way is which.
Confusion clouds
the mind,
despair settles
within the confusion.

Following this path
knowing not
where it leads.

Looking back on
past paths with
thoughts of what
a good place it
was in the path.

All the while knowing
that in the midst of
that place one was filled with
thoughts of being trapped
and seeking a way out.

Could it be that
one will look back
on this place in
the path years from
now with thoughts of
what a good place
in the path this
was to have been?

Though it feels like
it not, this place
in the path is always
a good place to be.

As there is no way to
move forward from the past
or the future.
One can only move
forward from this
moment in time,
this place in the path.

Knowing the answers
within seems so
far from knowing
the answers without.

Seems like a
distance of eternity.

An eternity of traveling
to the sweet spot within
where life is a blissful
walk in the park.

Stopping for a bit here
Stopping for a bit there
following the nudges
that life presents.

Knowing all we need
do is always BE
where we BE. – ©Camilla Downs

Blessings,
Camilla
See It. Share It. BE IT … Spread Love Everywhere You Go!

“Words of Alchemy”, published December 2019, is a free-verse poetry memoir covering the last 6 years of my life. The poetry of nature, the poetry of healing, the poetry of appreciation, the poetry of love, in one beautiful book.

Amazing news! My 19 year old daughter, Lillian Darnell’s debut book, “Where Would You Fly and Other Magical Stories” was published January 2018. Learn more and order here

Wonderfully exciting news! My 15 year old son, Thomas Darnell‘s book, Biggest Little Photographer is published. Be inspired! Learn more and order here.

Reblog: The Intoxicating Attraction of Mother Nature

October 16 2020

A walk to Tamarack Lake this morning. The smell of the evergreen trees, the silence, the beauty, the sound of the birds, the taste of fresh clean air. Intoxicating. Pure bliss.

   

Go here to see the original post, including more photos …

The Intoxicating Attraction of Mother Nature

The Number 18 – Words of Alchemy

The Number 18

Today is your 18th Birthday.
Lillian Paige Darnell is 18 years old today.

I can still see you in my mind’s eye
as a wee 4 pound sweetheart
as I wondered and dreamed
about your journey to adulthood.

Wow! Did we take giant
twists and turns,
paths less traveled.

Little did I know as I snuggled
you close, sang to you (sorry about that),
and read, read, read to you;
that the number 18 would come
to be a powerful number for you,
for us, in more ways than we could imagine.

When you were 3 years old,
As we sat eating dinner,
As the phone rang,
As the pediatrician delivered
news – 18p-, she said,
missing the short arm of
chromosome 18, she said –
that rendered me speechless,
with tears sliding down my face
into a dinner I could no longer eat.

Little did I know at the time
that this was not the horrible
news I assumed it to be.

Oh, yes. Life changing, for sure.
Yet, not in the way my mind
led me to believe in those first few weeks.

There is no way on this Earth
I could have foreseen how
life changing this would be for me.

Life changing for me so as to
let you be who you came here to be.
For that to happen unconditionally
and organically, I had much learning to do.

Not just learning about genetics,
chromosomes, DNA,
and the effects of deletions of genes.
That was the small stuff compared to
the enormity of the path that lie ahead.

As you step into adulthood on this day
It is my deepest hope that
I have made more decisions for
the highest good, than not.

It is my deepest hope that the times when I have
remembered to share and be unconditional love
stand out and far outweigh the times when
I have not been at my best.

May the wishes you wish come true.
May the dreams you dream become reality.
May the sunshine light your way ever more.
May the moon teach you its secrets.
May the birdsong always sing sweet melodies to your heart.

May you step into adulthood
with iridescent rose gold fairy
wings of the highest and brightest
as you take flight on the next
greatest adventure of your life.

I love you
I honor you
I respect you
I am grateful for all that you
have taught and continue to teach me.

You are You
And You Are Perfect!

Love,
Camilla
Mom – ©Camilla Downs

To learn more about Words of Alchemy, go here …

Words of Alchemy

Blessings,
Camilla
See It. Share It. BE IT … Spread Love Everywhere You Go!

“Words of Alchemy”, published December 2019, is a free-verse poetry memoir covering the last 6 years of my life. The poetry of nature, the poetry of healing, the poetry of appreciation, the poetry of love, in one beautiful book.

Amazing news! My 19 year old daughter, Lillian Darnell’s debut book, “Where Would You Fly and Other Magical Stories” was published January 2018. Learn more and order here

Wonderfully exciting news! My 15 year old son, Thomas Darnell‘s book, Biggest Little Photographer is published. Be inspired! Learn more and order here.

Poetry: Shadows – Words of Alchemy

Shadows

Do you see?

Slipped into the shadows
of your being, you have.
When sadness and lack
have settled within.
When comparison of
oneself with others
is the theme
of the day.

When appreciation
has faded and the
heart tightly closed,
you can be sure
the shadows have appeared.

When the light has
dimmed and you feel
smothered by the shadows.
Welcome the light back,
you can.

Remember all the times
Of living in the light
All the times of
joy and freedom.
All the times of
abundance and peace.
They are there too.

Do not forget them.

Remember those times
not with longing,
for this causes the
distance greater.
Remember those times
knowing they are
still there
simply awaiting
your return.

These thoughts are
the bridge that
connect the light
and darkness.
Comfortable you
are in the suffering
of the darkness.

The first
step onto the bridge
out of darkness
is the most
difficult step.

My gift to you
if you choose to see …

Life is a dance
with the light
and the shadows.

The dance of shadows cannot
be a dance sat out
if true freedom and peace
is the destination you seek.

For when you take the time
to dance with the shadows
with curiosity and patience
You will see that all of
life is a dance of contrast.

Have patience when
dancing with the shadows
of your being.

Love both the light and shadows
for one cannot
exist without the other.

Allow yourself to be free
and dance with me. – ©Camilla Downs

To learn more about the book, go here …

Words of Alchemy

Blessings,
Camilla
See It. Share It. BE IT … Spread Love Everywhere You Go!

“Words of Alchemy”, published December 2019, is a free-verse poetry memoir covering the last 6 years of my life. The poetry of nature, the poetry of healing, the poetry of appreciation, the poetry of love, in one beautiful book.

Amazing news! My 19 year old daughter, Lillian Darnell’s debut book, “Where Would You Fly and Other Magical Stories” was published January 2018. Learn more and order here

Wonderfully exciting news! My 15 year old son, Thomas Darnell‘s book, Biggest Little Photographer is published. Be inspired! Learn more and order here.

Open the Heart – Words of Alchemy

Open the Heart

Nature knows not
Her beauty without us.
We know not
Our beauty, compassion,
And peace without her.
Oh beautiful tree
The lessons thou impart to me
Open the heart to be free
Grateful to you
I will forever be. – ©Camilla Downs

Blessings,
Camilla
See It. Share It. BE IT … Spread Love Everywhere You Go!

“Words of Alchemy”, published December 2019, is a free-verse poetry memoir covering the last 6 years of my life. The poetry of nature, the poetry of healing, the poetry of appreciation, the poetry of love, in one beautiful book.

Amazing news! My 18 year old daughter, Lillian Darnell’s debut book, “Where Would You Fly and Other Magical Stories” was published January 2018. Learn more and order here

Wonderfully exciting news! My 14 year old son, Thomas Darnell‘s book, Biggest Little Photographer is published. Be inspired! Learn more and order here.

Liberation of this Soul – Words of Alchemy

Liberation of this Soul

She was tired.
Tired of trying to figure it out.

Tired of trying to make things work.
Tired of manipulating circumstances
to make things work.
Tired of trying to control situations to make things work.

Tired of living in confusion.
Tired of the suffering
created by way of her thoughts.

Tired of the chains that
bound her to the suffering.
Tired of dragging those
invisible chains through life.

Tired of not loving herself.
Tired of not being loved.
Tired of the responsibility of it all.

Tired of questioning her every decision.
Tired of hiding the Truth from herself.
Tired of running from her own self.

Tired of the darkness within.
Tired of the pull of the ego.

What she craved.
What she desperately needed.
Was … FREEDOM.

In desperation she dropped to her knees.
Crying to the all knowing,

Take this tired body,
Take this tired mind,
Take this confusion,
Take this suffering,

She let it all go.
She released it to the divine.

She asked for liberation
from her self-induced suffering.

Liberate this soul.
Liberate this heart.

Allow this heart to open.
Allow this heart to
receive and know unconditional love.
Allow this mind to know Clarity.

Liberation to the graceful
place of Knowing Freedom.
Liberation to the Place
of letting go.

Letting Go
And saying Yes
to Life. – ©Camilla Downs

Blessings,
Camilla
See It. Share It. BE IT … Spread Love Everywhere You Go!

“Words of Alchemy”, published December 2019, is a free-verse poetry memoir covering the last 6 years of my life. The poetry of nature, the poetry of healing, the poetry of appreciation, the poetry of love, in one beautiful book.

Amazing news! My 19 year old daughter, Lillian Darnell’s debut book, “Where Would You Fly and Other Magical Stories” was published January 2018. Learn more and order here

Wonderfully exciting news! My 15 year old son, Thomas Darnell‘s book, Biggest Little Photographer is published. Be inspired! Learn more and order here.

Reblog: We Have a Beautiful Earth

We Have A Beautiful Earth

September 18 2020

We’re in the good range with air quality, so went for a much needed walk. Scripts Wildlife Preserve and Little Washoe Lake. Sat on this perfectly shaped piece of driftwood, and just breathed. We have such a beautiful Earth.

    

Go here to see more photos …

We Have A Beautiful Earth

Nature’s Classroom – Words of Alchemy

Nature’s Classroom

The one supporting the many,
The many supporting the one,
This interdependent relationship you share
A lost art to we.

It’s clear to see,
The disconnect coming forth,
When the wild is taken from you,
Mirrored in the forests
Of the society of we.

Oh Mother, what a sweet
And beautiful teacher you Be. – ©Camilla Downs

Blessings,
Camilla
See It. Share It. BE IT … Spread Love Everywhere You Go!

“Words of Alchemy”, published December 2019, is a free-verse poetry memoir covering the last 6 years of my life. The poetry of nature, the poetry of healing, the poetry of appreciation, the poetry of love, in one beautiful book.

Amazing news! My 19 year old daughter, Lillian Darnell’s debut book, “Where Would You Fly and Other Magical Stories” was published January 2018. Learn more and order here

Wonderfully exciting news! My 14 year old son, Thomas Darnell‘s book, Biggest Little Photographer is published. Be inspired! Learn more and order here.