Throwback Post: This is the Space


March 21 2019

(Photo from August 2021 Walk)

This is the space I was in Tuesday night … I sat to write as I felt overwhelmed with the enormity of circumstances and unclear how to proceed.

When it’s my own internal struggles and turbulence I have learned to lean into it, be with it, and try to remember to keep love at the forefront of whatever it is.

What I have not learned is how to do this when someone I love dearly is struggling and I don’t have clarity about how to help them and feel deeply inadequate for the task. Especially when there are two someones struggling. And, sometimes, struggling at the same time.

This is what lies at the forefront of the current journey. It’s definitely not a pleasant place to be. Yet, offers much opportunity to continue to move through one’s own journey while at the same time holding space for those closest to you as they travel their own journey.

I went to bed shortly after writing this. I woke up feeling lighter and more at peace than I had in nearly a week. I also knew which first steps to take in helping my loved one and I took it. PSR Through Writing …. That’s what I call it. Peace Solutions Relief …. Through Writing ..

See It. Share It. BE IT … Spread Love Everywhere You Go!

“Words of Alchemy”, published December 2019, is a free-verse poetry memoir covering the last 6 years of my life. The poetry of nature, the poetry of healing, the poetry of appreciation, the poetry of love, in one beautiful book.

Amazing news! My 19 year old daughter, Lillian Darnell’s debut book, “Where Would You Fly and Other Magical Stories” was published January 2018. Learn more and order here

Wonderfully exciting news! My 15 year old son, Thomas Darnell‘s book, Biggest Little Photographer is published. Be inspired! Learn more and order here.

Surrender to the Moment

“Always say ‘yes’ to the present moment… Surrender to what is. Say ‘yes’ to life – and see how life starts suddenly working for you rather than against you.” ~Eckhart Tolle

Thomas at Lake April 2016

One lesson I continue to get the opportunity to master is that of surrendering to the moment, to life circumstances. When I continue to say “no” to what’s happening and not want to be where I am or experiencing what I’m experiencing, it brings on the stress, the impatience, and un-lovely thoughts.

When I embrace where I am, I feel spaciousness and deep peace. By surrendering I do not mean resigning to the story through which I interpret the situation and the “why is this happening to me”.

I am extremely blessed and grateful to have learned the skills to shift this deep-seated mental habit. Skills such as mindfulness and emotional connection. By no means do I have this perfected, yet it gets easier and easier not to label situations as good or bad.

“Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment.” ~Buddha

For anyone who needs this …. I send you much love and encouragement as you find the way to your own deep peace …

Let me know how I can help. There are many mindfulness and emotional connection articles on my blog with specific steps I have used. If you’d like to schedule a “Coffee Chat Connection” or “Walk With Me”, go here. xoxo

Camilla at Damonte Ranch Trail Fall 2015


See It. Share It. BE IT … Spread Love Everywhere You Go!

Did you know I wrote a book? It’s titled “D iz for Different – One Woman’s Journey to Acceptance” and you can read more about it here.

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Getting To The Bottom Of Grumpiness

“Go to Nature’s School – the one true university.” ~John Muir

(Here’s one to share my sense of humor with you. I may not share it much in my writings, yet I attempt to bring humor into every single day. For me, humor is the ointment that soothes the rawness of life …. )

One Sunday not too long ago, I was in a downright grumpy mood. Thomas and Lillian had joined in on the grumpiness. The tension and angst in the air was as thick as mud.

I completely disconnected from being mindful or even attempting to connect with this emotion. I ultimately decided to excuse myself and go for a much needed walk to connect with this grumpiness so as to release it.

A mere few minutes after heading out for the walk, I passed by this rock …

As I walked around the lake, my eyes kept catching glimpses of something – over and over again. It’s like I was going to keep seeing it until I truly noticed and the sight of it brought a smile to my face.

It not only brought a smile to my face; I laughed out loud. And, had to take pictures!

What broke the grip of this grumpiness?

Ducks and Their Bottoms. That’s right. Duck bottoms.

As I passed by ducks in the water, I kept thinking, something doesn’t look right. As I got closer I saw that the ducks had their head under the water. When a duck’s head is under water, their back end pops up. All you see is duck feet and duck bottom bobbing along!

I had noticed this in past walks, yet it didn’t move me like it did this time. Plus, it seemed like every single duck I passed had their head under water with their bottom just bopping along!

The picture is blurry as I had to zoom to get close enough. Yet, I think you get the idea.

By the time I walked in the door, I felt I had mostly shed whatever was causing the grumpiness. I entered with a much more joyful and peaceful heart ready to NOT bite any drama hooks dangled in front of me.

So, let’s get to the bottom of this post. 😉

When you know you’ve dug your heels in, you’ve bit into the grumpy (insert whatever negative emotion here) hook and are not going to let go easily; change your scenery, change the environment.

For me, that’s going for walk and being with nature. Being in nature may not have the same effect on you as it does with me. Find the sweet spot that helps you release the grip on that hook.

This is not to say that we push the negativity away. We still attempt to connect with how it feels so as to release it fully. Yet, sometimes this cannot be done in the moment or in the “space” we are within.

Now. Go find some duck bottoms and see if it doesn’t cause you to laugh … or at least smile … xoxo

This post is dedicated to Mother Nature, her beauty, her love, and her helpers!!

The picture of the stone honoring Mother Nature was taken at Rancho San Rafael Park and The Wilbur May Arboretum. Isn’t it interesting that it was donated and dedicated by someone with the initial “C”? And, it’s perfect for this post!


See It. Share It. BE IT … Spread Love Everywhere You Go!

Did you know I wrote a book? It’s titled “D iz for Different – One Woman’s Journey to Acceptance” and you can read more about it here.

Latest Articles:
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Go here to subscribe to my blog to ensure you receive new posts delivered straight to your inbox! Right here!

Fearless Choices – The Mindful Way

Choices and decisions.

There’s not a day that goes by that we aren’t faced with choices from which to make decisions. Small ones, big ones, scary ones, fun ones, happy ones, bitter ones. Choices and decisions are an integral part of life. We invite a more peaceful and joyful life when we approach choices and decisions mindfully.

Are we acting and making decisions from a place of love, or from a place of fear? This sounds simple on the surface. Upon stopping, being quiet and still when faced with choices and decisions, it’s easier to see that we do make some decisions from a place of fear or avoidance.

The decision made may even be the same whether it’s made from a place of fear or love. However, the internal and external results can be drastic.

Let’s look at the anatomy of a decision by dissecting a couple of examples.

I have a choice as to what kind of foods to feed myself and my family. I have made the choice for myself and my kids, Thomas and Lillian, to eat organic, non-gmo foods without artificial ingredients and low to no processed sugar. When looking at my choice between this type of food and this food’s opposite, I am presented with a deluge of research and opinions. Much of this claims that organic, non-gmo foods minus artificial ingredients are the healthy choice and will help prevent being overweight and many diseases.

With knowing this information, have I made my choice due to my fear of illness, disease, and weight issues. Or, have I made this choice because I love myself and my family and because I want to nourish this body and be in relationship with it for a long time? The root of how this decision is made matters. It matters tremendously.

The success of a decision hinges on whether or not it is made from a place of love or fear. When I took the time to dissect the decision I had made, I discovered I had made the choice from a place of fear. With a slight shift in my thoughts, my decision is still the same. Yet, I can now make this decision from a place of love. I have thoughts of love for myself and my family and choose healthy foods based on this love.

Let’s look at another example.

Am I accepting this job or this work because I fear having no money or am I accepting it because I am passionate about it and I know it’s my purpose to do this? Again, the ultimate decision may be the same. Yet, the possibility of this being a successful decision will hinge on whether it is made from love or fear. This can be applied in relationship decisions also.

Thoughts for making decisions:

  • Make sure you’re not hungry or thirsty
  • Try to be rested before making the actual decision
  • Be somewhere quiet (use earplugs if you need too – I use these wax earplugs (amazon affiliate link) for falling asleep and meditating. I LOVE my earplugs!! The foam earplugs did not block the street noise.)
  • Be still
  • Move your awareness to your heart
  • Lightly release any thoughts that arise
  • Connect with your emotions about this decision

Are you feeling fear (or any emotions related to it) OR are you feeling love (or any emotions related to it)? Don’t analyze the emotions. Just be with whatever it is. It will be up to you if you can shift to seeing a love-based way to make the same choice, or if it’s only fear driving the choice.

This is not to say that one suddenly make the shift to making all decisions from a place of love and not fear. It’s enough to simply stop and note the root of the decision. And if you feel moved to make this shift for yourself, start small. Make it easy so that you can successfully shift to making all decisions from a place of love.

I am not meaning to imply that there are wrong and right decisions or bad and good decisions. I feel we can make whichever decision we choose into the “right” decision for us. This post is speaking more to what happens internally, not the choice itself. xoxo

(This is a topic that came forth in a client session. If you like my techniques and energy and feel you’d like guidance with living mindfully, please contact me. You can also visit this page to learn more.)

Latest “Mindful Living” Articles:
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See It. Share It. BE IT … Spread Love Everywhere You Go!

Go here to subscribe to my blog to ensure you receive new posts delivered straight to your inbox! Right here!