Fear ~~ Control ~~ Manipulation ~~ Conditional Love ~~ Smallness ~~ Victim

These six have been my friends throughout this life. I unconsciously believed they were my protectors, my power, and what allowed me to live this life as I thought I wanted to experience it.

In December 2016, I had an intuitive knowing that the year 2017 would bring with it a Shift. That has been happening since January 2017 and I can hardly keep up with all that is shifting for me. It’s happening incredibly fast and many times it is absolutely not fun. It is exhausting as I am BEing in the depths of my own darkness.

I am becoming more conscious to all of the ways in which I had been living unconsciously. I am remembering, connecting, and releasing memories and events from my past; pivotal things that happened at a sweet and tender young age. I am awakening and discovering the costume I have worn most of my life (excluding as a young child).

I am discovering a freedom, an untethering, a surrendering …. a Liberation.

This is a brick received at the last Alchemist Theatre event. A brick which we were to imprint a word or words onto that came to us during an alchemy meditation. Our instructions were to write the word(s) on the brick and to destroy the brick in an earth friendly manner.

The word that came forth for me was “surrender”. That didn’t make sense to me until the next day when I realized I was to surrender these six, old, and dear friends listed above.

Prayer to the brick energy and holder of the dear and no longer needed protectors:

I Love You All.

You have been there for me
when I needed you most, or so I thought.

You saved me from failure.
You saved me from embarrassment.
You were the vehicle that
helped me live and experience
this life as I thought in my best interest.

I Love You All.

Yet, now I realize
this was unconscious living.
And I now see that
you were not true friends.

I mistakenly called you all in long ago
to keep me from hurting.
I am conscious now. I have awakened.

I send you off with deep love
for why we both thought you were here.
It’s time and I am ready for my
true colors to shine through.

I surrender you all
to be transmuted into
Unconditional Love, Courage, Greatness,
Allowing, and Saying Yes to Life.

Be free my friends. I release you.
Welcome True Colors.
And so it is.

I had no idea how emotional I would become while crushing the brick. That’s the only reason I included all of the pictures Lillian took. I connected with anger, felt it, and released it. And, I felt incredibly lighter and more joyful afterwards. Hallelujah ….. xoxo

After I wrote this post I came across this poem I wrote in December 2016. WOW!

Come, Be with me.

You are drawn
to me for a reason.