I am grateful to have had the opportunity to share a “respond with love and love is the answer” philosophy in a recent Huffington Post article. It served as a great reminder for me at the perfect moment. It seems that almost always the messages I share come about with perfect timing for me. 6 Lessons Learned Through Divorce and Marriage. My quote is the very last one – #6.
Here is the original “quote” that I shared with Michelle Colon-Johnson, the author of the article. This has not been edited and is in it’s raw form. I told Michelle I knew that it was quite wordy and that I had simply opened my heart and let the words flow. We’ve known one another since January 2012 so she’s familiar with my philosophy. With that knowledge, she did an amazing job at condensing my long “quote” to one beautiful sentence! Michelle’s question was, “What did you learn through divorce?”
I learned that love is the necessary magical ingredient for living a peaceful and joyous life. I could choose to be full of despair and sadness because my ex and I did not have a healthy relationship after divorce, full of despair and sadness because I am raising two children alone and with one having special needs. I chose instead for the divorce that happened in 2007 to open the door to my own enlightenment. I learned how to connect with my emotions, to face my own darkness, and to shed what no longer serves me. I learned to not take what others say to or about me personally. I learned to see my ex-husband as one of my greatest teachers and to know that when I find fault in another, it really has to do with me and not that person. I learned to respond to situations with love and to know that when a person is delivering unkindness to me, that it’s most likely due to that person not feeling loved. I learned how judgmental I was about single moms and those that chose divorce. Fortunately, these parts of me longer exist and I am full of compassion, empathy, and love for others. I am human and judgments still creep into my thoughts. However I recognize and release those thoughts. What did I learn from experiencing divorce? I learned about peace, joy, being non-judgmental, how to see the gift in uncomfortable situations, how to be me …. and that love is always the answer.
This learning and philosophy is not something that happened over night. I got divorced in September 2007 and it took a great deal of time, patience, practice, and love of self to reach this point. An older post titled, One Magical Ingredient, goes into more detail about this. Having said that, I am human, and at times I forget what I have learned and revert to old habits and old ways of thinking.
I am grateful now that I can recognize when I have slipped back, be kind to myself in noticing how I’m thinking, and then begin to release it. I have chosen to share what I have learned over these past 18 years with others through coaching, my book, this blog, and facebook. I would love to hear from you if you feel moved. xoxo
See It. Share It. BE IT … Spread Love Everywhere You Go!