Whispers of a Wild Summer Trip
Camilla at a Scenic Overlook Near Lake Mead – taken by Thomas – July 2016
(Written to be read as Spoken Word poetry)
This was a case of
Don’t think, just do it
I thought about it just enough to know
That this would be an opportunity
To walk into my fire
Let me tell you
I wildly walked into that fucking fire
And came out the other side
Thinking, girl you are unhinged!
I didn’t know what I was in for when
Me and my two kids, Thomas and Lillian
Began attending the yearly
Chromosome 18 Family conference in 2009
I didn’t grasp
the significance of
attending our first conference
I didn’t know the weight
held within taking that first step
That it would have such a
profoundly positive effect on us
I didn’t know
That this event
These strangers
Our connection
Would soak deeply
Into our hearts
Our souls
Becoming a part of us
Sprouting into life-long friendships
I didn’t know that
It would become so important to us
That I would do whatever it took
To get us there
Then came the 2016 conference
San Antonio, Texas that year
Every year we held a family fundraiser
Creating artwork to sell
Raising money to pay for the airfare,
hotel, and registration fee
2016 was a financially hard year
Not enough money that summer
I was deeply worn out
Feeling the exhaustion
From years of unease
Worrying about how to pay for food
Pay the rent
Pay for gas
Pay for necessities
Combined with advocating for Lillian
The piles of paperwork
The never ending phone calls
But I knew that I must
Get us to that conference
So with very little thought
I decided I would drive us
I would drive us from Reno, Nevada
To San Antonio, Texas
I would drive us 1,722 miles
25 hours with 1 adult
1 special needs 14-year-old
And a full of energy, talkative,
17 questions a minute, 10-year-old
In a 15-year-old car
With a tendency to overheat
A 15-year-old car
That burned through oil
As quickly as I burned through
joints in my teen years
Sure
No worries
Right?
What could go wrong?
One Camilla meltdown later
A very late start
Spending an hour in a gas station bathroom
with Lillian vomiting due to car sickness
No cell service for 8 hours
Hundreds of thoughts of getting
Stranded on the side of the road, and worse
During those 8 hours
The car overheating many times
Not using the air conditioner in 90–100 degree weather
So the car would cool down
My body so intensely hot
I began to fantasize about taking ice baths
The glue holding the driver’s side mirror in place?
Oh, that shit melted due to the intense heat
Holding the mirror with my left hand
While driving the last 45 minutes
Finally arriving in San Antonio
Three days after leaving Reno
Ready to drop from tiredness and relief
Then four days of joy
Enjoying the conference
Time to get back to Reno
Luggage in the car
Team TLC in the car
Borrow duct tape from the hotel
Tape driver’s side mirror
And we were off
{Lunch left sitting in the lobby — Shit}
{Adding a 30 minute detour to get new lunch}
Three long days later
Rolling into Reno after midnight
My body fueled only by my tenacity
Every single muscle of my body aching
I finally landed in bed with relief
Pleased with myself that I did it
I got us to the conference
Damn, I did it
I drove my little family 3,444 miles
To do something that
Is important to all of us
I conquered that damn road
I became a (S)hero in that moment
The pride for having achieved this wild trip was not alone
It brought with it a strong, informed voice
Whispering ….
That was wild
That was a little bit crazy
That was a little bit, maybe, not the smartest thing you’ve ever done
And there is no way in hell
No way in hell
I will ever do that again.
Not
Ever
Again.
©Camilla Downs, 2024
Selfie of Thomas Lillian Camilla at a rest stop July 2016
Written using a combination of three different prompts. At times, I like to combine prompts.
“Don’t think, just speak” was our Monday Night Poetry prompt.
A prompt from my poetry friend, Elise. “I didn’t know what I was in for when …”
Wild Writers Club August Theme of Wild Summer — Found here:
This poem was shared on Medium in August 2024. There will be a delay in posting poetry on my blog as paid Medium subscribers get first reads. You can connect with me on Medium here. There is a free version.