I Am a Trillion Parts – Monday Night Poetry

March 15 2024

Monday Night Poetry.

Prompt: How do you let go of something that won’t let go of you?

Such great poems were shared.

I Am A Trillion Parts

Why is it that I cannot let you go?

My mind is on board, most days
My heart agrees, most days

Yet, there’s this mystical thread
Connecting us

Some days it’s visible, strong and tight
Other days it’s invisible, and I am free to let you go

Some days it sparkles
Some days it’s sticky sweet
Some days it’s sharp and painful

I know it sounds crazy

One day, I’m free
Free to let you go
Feeling relief
Feeling strong
Feeling invincible

Two days later
I don’t want to let you go
I feel the comfort of knowing you’re there
Remembering, with pleasure, our time together

I am not one dimensional

Feeling so damn good having made
The decision to let you go
Feeling so damn good having made
The decision not to let you go

There’s the free spirit in me
That just wants to go with the flow
Enjoying life in the moment
Let what is, be what is

There’s the little girl in me
Who doesn’t want to lose
That which helps her to feel good
Makes her feel good
Feels so damn good

The little girl who doesn’t
Want the feeling of being abandoned to return
Covering her heart in a cloud of darkness

I am not one dimensional

There’s light at the end of this tunnel
The more I learn about myself
The more I uncover and walk through
The trauma of my childhood
The more my mind and heart connect the dots
Of not wanting to let go of past trauma
The closer I get to letting you go

Here I come again

And while I make my way to this place
Of letting you go, for good
Knowing that yesterday is gone
That time is lost forever
Time will not wait for me

Written on my heart
Is the knowing that my time
Is now limited
For the first time in my life
I can clearly see the finish line of my life

For that reason,
I damn well plan on enjoying myself
Enjoying the bright light of others
Enjoying the company of others
Hugging those that want to share this intimate
Love-filled act

I will wake up one day
After uncovering all facets of me
To finally be able to let you go for good
With no regrets

And that right there,
Is fucking freedom
Like no other.
Camilla Downs – 2024

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