What I would have said if I had been prepared Wednesday night, March 21, 2012, at the eWomenNetwork Women’s Success Summit ….

I was surprised with a beautiful, heartfelt recognition of my success by my dear friend Kymberlee Simantel. Hearing the last 5 years of my life retold by my amazing friend was extremely moving. I am hugely blessed with the friends I have made since moving to Reno in 2006, all who are eWomenNetwork Reno/Carson/Tahoe/Vegas/Sierra Nevadas Chapter members. My message to anyone who needs it – surround yourself with those who see your light, those who support you, those who will tell you things you need to hear at times and trust yourself, trust yourself, trust yourself. Never doubt your inner voice.

I hope with all my heart that I enrich my eWomenNetwork friends lives as much as they enrich mine.

Choosing to attend an eWomenNetwork Dinner Event in July 2007 was one of the most life improving, life inspiring choices I had made up to that point in my life. When it’s time for us to grow within our own unique box, sometimes we must face fears … fears of going into a room alone, not knowing anyone and creating a new life … Thank you Kymberlee Simantel for being managing director for the Reno/Tahoe chapter and thank you Sandra Yancey for your light tonight and for founding this amazing organization!!

With my eWomenNetwork friends’ help I have gifted to twelve recipients through Turning Views Foundation’s Gift a Voice Project. Our latest recipient is a Grandma, Karen, in Michigan whose vocal cords were removed in December due to cancer. We were able to give her a “voice” so she can “speak” to her grandkids. Karen is guardian to these two young children and has been struggling to communicate with them.

I have created friendships with women and men who have helped me to discover my unique gift and who have furthered my acceptance of myself. Friends who are always there when I need them, who say things I need to hear but may not want to hear … friends who support and encourage me, friends who know when to say “It’s time to put your big girl panties on” and friends who know just the right time to remind you of all that you have accomplished and all whose lives you inspire and enrich.

eWomenNetwork and Kymberlee Simantel provided me the opportunity to create these kinds of friendships:

A friend’s husband is there to pick up my son, Thomas, from kindergarten when I’m at a speaking engagement, a friend’s son is “Big Brother” to my son Thomas, friends who are on the Board of Directors for the nonprofit I founded, friends who have slipped me money just because, friends who came out in full force to support my Gift a Voice fundraiser in March 2011, a friend who has picked the kids and I up from the airport more than once, friends who are listed as local contacts on my kids’ emergency contact paperwork at school, a friend who brings me goody bags of homemade food, friends who donate their last generation iPhone to the Gift a Voice project, friends who care about my kids as much as they care about me, friends who look me in the eye and say, “Stop. Look what you have created. Look what you have done. Take that in.”, friends who have always seen me for the amazing person I am AND friends who let me do all of this for them too.

By choosing to be an eWomenNetwork member and SHOWING UP I’ve made friends who encourage me to let my light shine by shining their light on me. I’ve made friends who GET the value of encouraging others. Some people may go their entire lives without being encouraged by another soul.

Smile at others, encourage others … you just NEVER know the ripple effect that this will create and it will absolutely come back to you. It WILL ….

I LOVE YOU LADIES and a few GOOD MEN, I TRULY LOVE YOU!!!

Here’s the beautiful mosaic candle holder Kymberlee made for me:

It’s Beautiful … It’s Different … It’s full of LOVE!! Message on bottom: “Camilla, because Different is good, I made this different candle holder for you!” It’s just magical with the candle lit with all the glass pieces lit from the flame!! ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ you so much Kymberlee – Thank you for sharing your light with me!!

I’m pretty sure Lillian has said something like this at least once in the past. I’m not sure exactly why, but this time it felt like a punch to the gut.

Lillian falls frequently due to depth perception and balance issues. She fell pretty hard on the tile floor tonight, and this is what prompted her to make the, “I wish I wasn’t an 18p- girl” statement. She’s okay. Got one heck of a bruise on her elbow. I told her it was okay to feel like that and to wish she didn’t have 18p-. I also told her that 18p- is not who she is. I told her she is Lillian, and 18p- is just a special quality she has. She smiled and said, “I know.” Twenty minutes later she was fine and had forgotten all about her comment.

I didn’t though . . . Guess you could say this is my Moment of Defeat – Take Two.

The moment after she was in bed, I had that “time standing still” feeling and the tears began flowing. I began to question everything I’m doing, my belief system, my thought processes. I had the “Who do you think you are?” and “What are you doing?” thoughts in the mix too. The last time something like this hit so hard was in May 2010. I wrote about it here: A Moment of Defeat.

Why? Why did this statement, on this particular night, this particular week have this impact on me? Maybe partly due to the book I’m about to release in which I share about myself, my past, my thought processes and my belief system. I’m on the edge, facing some fears and taking hold of that vein of courage within me. Then, I’m sucker punched by one little statement from the little girl who inspired me to “be” where I’m at and to write this book.

Maybe partly due to needing a break from this beautiful young lady. Maybe partly due to feeling a bit guilty as I’ve not shown patience lately in understanding what Lillian is trying to say to me. Guilty because there are times when I cringe when I hear her begin to speak to me. I know I will not understand half of the words she speaks and I will have to focus 100% on what she’s trying to say and it will take double or triple the amount of time to understand one little sentence . . .

Yep, this one hit hard. Only for a moment though (well, okay, maybe a few hours!). I remind myself that I DO exhibit patience more times than not, I DO choose to have a sense of humor and laugh about it with Lillian. I remind myself I KNOW why I wrote this book. I KNOW that my belief system and thought processes are right for me as this is what brought me to the acceptance and happiness that has always been right here within me. I remind myself that I am sharing it with others in the hopes that something I’ve written will give someone hope, encouragement and inspiration. I remind myself that just a few hours earlier a little girl with wisdom filled eyes looked in mine and said “I know.”

Life coaching has been around for a long time. A Special Needs Life Coach has been specifically trained to support families who have a family member with special needs and the individual with special needs as well. A Special Needs Life Coach functions as an extension of the family as many families simply cannot do the work alone. The coach and the family decide what role the coach will play in the partnership. A Special Needs Life Coach is dedicated to improving life quality for persons with special needs and developmental disabilities and their families.

One thing to remember is that a Special Needs Life Coach is not a therapist, teacher or counselor. The involvement with a family is usually specific in nature and designed to meet a particular goal and action plan. A Special Needs Life Coach can assist with research, problem solving, connect the family with resources and create and facilitate a Circle of Support.

How You and Your Family Will Benefit From Working With A Certified Special Needs Life Coach

When we became parents, we didn’t receive a user manual with that beautiful little bundle of joy in our arms. We certainly didn’t receive a “How to Live Your Life and Raise Your Child with Special Needs” manual either when we received this news.

Many times this can be overwhelming. Most of us did not imagine becoming a parent and being directly responsible for our child for theirs and our entire life. Many of us like to think we can do this by ourselves and that people will think less of us if we ask for help. Asking for help is a sign of strength.

You may not be clear about why you want to have a Special Needs Life Coach, you just know you need help. Your Special Needs Life Coach will help you gain clarity about why you want help.

If you want to form a partnership with someone who is an extension of your family, someone who inspires you and enriches your life, someone who can do the “digging” for you; then working with a Special Needs Life Coach will be a positive experience for you.

Does Any Of This Sound Familiar?

Do you crave simplicity?
Do you feel overwhelmed with what step to take next?
Are you stressed out all the time?
Do you feel you, your family or your family member with special needs has untapped potential?
Do you feel inadequate when at doctor’s appointments or in IEP meetings?
Do you have an overflowing to do list of items to look into or research?
Is your greatest worry and fear what will happen to your child when you are no longer here?

If you answered yes to any or all of these questions, a Special Needs Life Coach can help. Find one that suits your personality and style. If that seems like me, you can learn more here or contact me here.

My Theme for 2012 . . .

It’s the time of year when many people make resolutions for the New Year. I can’t remember that I’ve ever made resolutions. It’s never been appealing to me. What I have done for the past few years is to have a theme for the year. I then use this theme to help with decision making and to have as a vision for the year. I create a vision board to go along with my theme and vision for the year. This gets framed and hung on my wall where I can see it every day. Last year Thomas and Lillian joined me in doing this also and we had fun as a family putting our boards together. Each of their boards is hanging on their wall also. This method has worked miraculously for me so I thought I’d share it with you. Maybe it’s time for a change from the “old style” of resolutions . . . Maybe it’s time to do it different!

Each year my theme and board have gotten more simple. In fact, everything in my life has gotten more simple over this past year. I find that I like and crave simplicity and life is so much easier to enjoy when I have simplicity. Usually I choose two words for my yearly theme. The 2011 theme has been Clarity and Faith. I had a vision of Team TLC being the foundation of 2011. If you’ve been following me, you know that Team TLC was born this year and has blossomed into something wonderful. I sensed how important it was for me to turn my focus and attention on my little family and that all things good would flow from my attention to our Team. I then had four quadrants that stemmed from our Team TLC Foundation. Two quadrants were health and weight. I have lost twenty six pounds and am more aware of the foods I and we eat. Still working on the other two quadrants. So for now, I’ll keep those to my little ole self!

2012 is The Year of the Present Moment. The foundation will be to Focus on My Purpose in the Present Moment. To make more of an effort to be aware and really truly there for whoever I’m with, talking to, conducting business with or focusing completely on whatever I am doing or whatever event I am attending. I decided to choose three theme words for 2012 and they are Kindness, Knowing and Gratitude. Kindness as I enjoy spreading and sharing kindness and I believe it doesn’t stop with the person I share it with. I also believe we attract what we authentically put out there. Knowing as a reminder to listen to my intuition and gut. Even when I don’t know why I’m being pulled in a certain direction or how I am going to “do” whatever it is. Gratitude as life is less stressful and more joyful and peaceful when I am thankful for all that I have and thankful for all that I will have . . . grateful as if I already had it.

My four quadrants for 2012 are ME, Team TLC, Thomas and Lillian. In keeping with my simplistic theme, I have two words for each one of these. My quadrant is about creativity and patience. Team TLC is about a beach vacation. The Thomas quadrant is about coping and respect. The Lillian quadrant is about math and communication.

I have made many shifts this year. I wrote a book, D iz for Different – One Woman’s Journey to Acceptance, lost twenty six pounds, made a complete change in my career and purged and decluttered my house, garage and life. The book is in the final stages of being edited and cover design. I have three modules left in obtaining my certification as a Special Needs Life Coach. Here’s a little tidbit I learned about purging household/kitchen items . . . Be ready to explain when your Mom visits for Christmas and you got rid of some of the things she gave you!! Oops! No worries y’all, I didn’t get rid of anything of sentimental value . . . just a few odds and ends. I figure if I only use it once a year, I don’t want it taking up space in my life!

Here’s what my vision board will look like when I’ve got it completed. It’ll definitely be much prettier though! Now, what about it? Will you do it different in 2012?

We’re all busy, we’re all in a hurry and we all have too much to do. So, I’ve combed through the posts on this site for 2011, looking at the total number of facebook likes and comments, and created a “Most Popular” list for those that may have missed something and those that want to read again and share. Enjoy y’all!

Dares, Choices and Changing the World – April 5, 2011

Decisions from the Gut – May 27, 2011

The Shift That Happens – May 31, 2011

O is for Observe – August 7, 2011

Purging, Weight Loss and Writing a Book – September 11, 2011

“I’m having so much fun I wish I could stay 5 years old forever!” – Thomas Darnell

We only get each day ONE time – no do overs allowed! Might as well enjoy the heck out of em! Hope each of y’all takes an opportunity today to have the imagination of a 5 year old!!

Ever have a hunch, a gut feeling, something telling you to do something right this very minute?  Around July 1, 2011, I had an urge and a little voice telling me I needed to purge boxes in my garage.  I wrote about it here.  Some of these boxes had been packed since my separation in 2006.  I was feeling {an extremely strong feeling and longing] the need to simplify . . . get rid of stuff.  I fought it though and kept making excuses as to why I could not do it right this minute.  Too busy with other stuff, ya know.  The feeling got stronger and stronger and the voice got louder and louder until I finally listened.

In the first few boxes I unpacked, I came across a book that I had completely forgotten about and had never read.  That book is titled “E is for Entrepreneur” and it’s author is Barbara Hranivolich.  I opened the book and inscribed on the first page was a message to me from Barb. It reads, “This never would have happened without you.”  I had completely forgotten that in 2007 I connected with Barb online and asked her if she would like to be a contributor on a blog I had at the time for women entrepreneurs.  She began an alphabet series to tie in with being an entrepreneur.  I read the book that night and discovered that Barb mentioned me in the C is for Collaboration chapter of the book also.  She wrote, “There’s the woman I’ve never met in person, but who asked me to write these essays for her blog. What a gift!”  Lastly, Barb included my name on her Gratitude List in the book.  WOW!!  What a powerful gift for me to receive!

For the past year and a half I have had the intention of writing a book and it had not materialized.  I sat down and read Barb’s book and a few seconds after finishing the book, I had another urge, a spark of inspiration . . . yes, that gut feeling.  THIS is how my first book was to be structured.  I began to write this book the next morning.  I started to arise earlier than I had been and wrote a section every morning.  I delivered the first draft to my editor and a few “reviewer” friends on Friday, September 9, 2011.

“D iz for Different” is the title with a subtitle of “One Mom’s Journey from Acceptance to Zigzag”.  It’s a memoir of how I came to accept myself and processed and accepted my function as parent to a child with special needs.  Intertwined with how I have to come to think the way in which I do and live my life the way in which I do.  The book will be available in November 2011 at the latest; although I’m shooting for October 2011.  I’ve received an endorsement for my book from Jim Stovall, author of “The Ultimate Gift” which was also a movie.  I am grateful beyond words to Mr. Stovall and my heart and soul are warm and joyful for his kind words.

“As a blind person myself, I understand the challenge and blessing of doing things differently. In this book, Camilla shares her journey with Lillian which will help us all do more, give more, and be more.” Jim Stovall, Emmy-award Winner, Best-selling author, The Ultimate Gift

Not only that, I continued to purge in my garage, in my house and in my body.  I have lost 23 pounds while writing this book and purging and simplifying.  Disgust . . . that’s what did it.  I was just plain disgusted with myself for having gained that weight over the last two years.  I’d had enough, gosh darn it.  So I just quit eating so darn much! I didn’t realize how much food I was eating.  I still eat all my favorite {junk} foods.  I did not deprive myself of anything I enjoy drinking or eating.  I simply ate and do eat less of it.  Instead of eating half a bag of chips, I eat one serving.  I still indulge in Dorinda’s chocolate when I have access to it and still have one or two Dove dark chocolates every day.  I still drink dark lager beers like Guinness and Buckbean’s Black Noddy, still drink wine and still have a Bloody Mary and Dirty Martini when the occasion calls for it!  I still eat ice cream, hot dogs, pizza and pasta . . . I just eat less of it.

I also made one more major shift and change during this Purge Palooza.  I think I’m gonna save that for another blog post.  My gut’s saying to wait just a little longer on sharing that one!!

It is an indescribable feeling and my hope and the reason I share this with you is for each and every one of you to experience listening to your gut and hunches.  You just never know what will come of it . . . Although, I bet you’ll find it’s exactly what you wanted . . . .

Hope y’all enjoy our August Adventures!!

“It’s a perfect day to pick flowers.” -Thomas Darnell

- May each of you enjoy the heck out of this perfect day!! -