Have You Ever Discovered Treasure – National Poetry Month – April 16th

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April is National Poetry Month. I’m going to attempt to write one poem every day this month. Halfway there! Today’s poem: 16/30 for April 16th.

Have You Ever Discovered Treasure?

The year was 2014
I was struggling
I was sad
I felt stuck, felt trapped
I felt without direction
I didn’t know how to support myself, my two kids
I desperately needed and sought answers

During this time
I had a profound dream

My two deceased grandmothers had a starring role in this dream
Estelle Eady Mann
Elnor Key Downs

In my dream
They lived together
I was extremely happy to see them
We sat enjoying each other’s company
I caught them up with my life

We began to go from room to room
Looking for treasures
Treasures that belonged to each one of them
Treasures that had been lost

There seemed an urgency to our searching
Something was about to happen
Unsuccessfully we searched the house
Attempting to locate these treasures
It felt like we searched for hours

When nearly all hope was lost
I discovered a hidden room in the house
Galvanized and relieved
The three of us entered the hidden room
Surrounding us were the lost treasures

My grandmothers knowingly stood before me
Sharing a message

This room represents you, Camilla
You are searching outside of yourself
For answers
for direction
For knowing your why
We want you to know
You are the treasure
Everything you need is within you

In that moment I woke from the dream
I was visibly touched by this profound dream
By my grandmothers visiting me
I immediately got out of bed
To capture this dream in my journal
I did not want to forget any details

It was an intense dream
Helping me to relax into the present moment
Helping me to release a shit load of worrying
It helped me to keep going
Helped me to keep going
Keep going

This dream was vivid
It seemed real
I had never had a dream like this
I have not had a dream like this since

My two amazing, strong, tenacious
Grandmothers rescued me that night
They entered my dreams
Took me by the hand
Guiding me to the treasure for which I had been searching

Estelle Eady Mann
Elnor Key Downs

Thank you for your help during that time
Thank you for continuing to enter my thoughts when I need it most.
Thank you
Thank you

Camilla Downs, 2024

**Prompt: RECALL ONE OF THE STRANGEST DREAMS YOU’VE EVER HAD AND WRITE ABOUT HOW IT MADE YOU FEEL OR WRITE IT OUT IN AS MUCH DETAIL AS YOU CAN REMEMBER.

The Heart of It – National Poetry Month – April 15th

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April is National Poetry Month. I’m going to attempt to write one poem every day this month. Today’s poem: 15/30 – April 15th.


(South Lake Tahoe, August 2023, Taken by me)

The Heart of It

When I think of summer
I think of —

Dandelions dotting the landscape
Tall sunflowers
With their head facing the sun

Japanese honeysuckle vines
With their tiny bubble of hidden nectar

Roasted sweet corn
Slathered in butter
Juicy sweet pineapple

Lemons
And fresh squeezed lemonade
Bananas
And homemade banana pudding

Happy vibes
Blooming with every tulip,
every daffodil

Popsicles that instantly melt
Dripping down the hand

The bright sun
Drenching everything in warmth

Swimming
Watermelons
Laughter

Iridescent bubbles
French vanilla Ice cream
Tropical flavored snoballs

Barefoot
Joyful
Energetic

Golden sand
Beach waves
Lake Tahoe

Seagulls
Swallowtail butterflies
Cricket chirps

When I think of summer —

I think of creativity blooming

Camilla Downs, 2024

**I mixed two prompts. Monday Night Poetry prompt of “Bloom” and this one: Prompt – A poem that collects images the way a magpie collects shiny things in its nest. Collect images of yellow things, arranged to create a meaningful poem.

Monostich Style – National Poetry Month – April 14th Bonus Poetry

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April is National Poetry Month. I’m going to attempt to write one poem every day this month. Today’s poem: 14/30 – April 14th – Bonus. I’ve never tried monostich poems. Thought I’d give it a shot.

**This was a bonus prompt from April 11th. Prompt for the day honors the “ones” in the number 11. Today, we’d like to challenge you to write either a monostich, which is a one-line poem, or a poem made up of one-liner style jokes/sentiments. From https://www.napowrimo.net/

The Beginning of the End – National Poetry Month – April 14th

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April is National Poetry Month. I’m going to attempt to write one poem every day this month. Today’s poem: 14/30 – April 14th.

The Beginning of the End

There’s a barely visible view
The murky fog nearly obscures everything
There’s a deep window ledge with pottery pieces
Made by my daughter in her preschool class
Her name and the date are written on the back
With a blue sharpie marker
The translucent strawberry curtains are draped to the side

The mood, this setting
Transported me back in time
An eventful night in Spring 2006

I couldn’t sleep
My stomach was bothering me
It felt like something was wrong
The air, the energy was unsettled
The weird feeling lodged in my gut

My stomach gurgling with discomfort
I made my way to the bathroom
As I sat on the toilet
I couldn’t shake this unsettled feeling

That’s when I saw his phone on the edge of the counter
I debated with myself whether or not to pick it up
Whether or not to infringe upon another person’s privacy
The weird feeling that something was not right
Overtook the debate happening in my mind

I opened to the call history
My gut discomfort suddenly worsened

I found hours long calls on his phone,
Dozens per day
Calls with another woman
I began to panic, to sob, my body became numb

I wondered what I had done wrong
What I had done wrong
Had done wrong
Wrong

I was awake the rest of the night
Analyzing the previous days and months

The next morning I asked him about her
He blew me off, telling me I was being paranoid
I was being a crazy woman
Being a crazy woman
Crazy woman

I thought
I
HAD
DONE
SOMETHING
WRONG

That whatever was happening
It was my fault
What had I done wrong
To make this happen?

That was the beginning
Of
The End.

This scene initiated the months of turmoil
The emotional hell
Of trying to figure out why another person
Has done what they did
Has said what they said
Is the way they are

That was the beginning of understanding
I could not let society
The leanings of the community I had aligned with
To dictate what was right or wrong for me

That was the beginning of showing myself grace
The beginnings of understanding
That I had done nothing wrong

That was the beginning
Of the fog lifting
Of clarity
Of knowing

There’s an expansive view
The sun shines with its rays reaching far into the room
Brightening the walls, the corners
Catching and reflecting through the crystals suspended from the top of the window,
Decorating the walls, the ceiling, the floor with rainbow prisms
I can see the Virginia Foothills and Mt Rose
There’s a deep ledge with a cat perch attached to it
There are no curtains

I can see clearly now

Camilla Downs, 2024

**I mixed two ideas. This one – Prompt: Write a poem using this photo as a jumping off point. The other idea from the poetry workshop attending this afternoon. I’ve attached the original prompt photo (second) and one of my own window photos.

Fire Dancing – National Poetry Month – April 13th

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April is National Poetry Month. I’m going to attempt to write one poem every day this month. Today’s poem: 13/30 – April 13th.

Fire Dancing

We’re in the middle of nowhere,
Or so it seems

Potholes State Park – Moses Lake, Washington
Camping on our own mini island of sand

The sky,
e x p a n s i v e
It seems as if there are an infinity of stars
Blanketing the sky

My amazing step-dad, Frank, worked for Duroboat
Receiving one as a bonus
We had scores of adventures in that sweet lil boat

It took several trips in Frank’s
Bright yellow Duroboat
Transporting us and supplies
From the parking lot
To our island

One trip for a person or two
With the first load of supplies
Another trip or two for more supplies
More people

First order of business
Toilet paper roll slid onto a branch
With a hole dug for the call of nature

Gusts of wind so powerful,
At times flattening the tents
Dare not open your mouth facing the wind
Unless you enjoy a mouth packed with sand

Campfire going
Music on
Talking
Laughing
Bloody Marys tipped back
Talking
Laughing
Dinner cooked and eaten
S’mores next
Talking
Laughing
Drenched in wine
Dancing around the campfire
Nearly falling into the fire

The Duroboat running out of gas
On the way from our mini island
Back to the parking lot
Stranded

My handsome first love — Jim
Jumping in the frigid water,
Attempting to tread water plus tow the boat
Going nowhere fast

More laughing
Laughing
Laughing

Along comes a sightseeing ferry
Passengers pointing, having a good ole laugh
At our silly butts in that lil Duroboat
They toss a line to us
Give us a tow
They take pictures of us
We take pictures of them
A mutual good time
More laughter

The smell of campfire
Reminds me of celebrations
Enjoying life with my mom and Frank
My step-sister, Heather
Step-brother, Tony
My brother, Robert
Laughter
Good times
Coming together
Letting loose
Crazy times

Gratitude that we got to experience
These times with each other

The smell of a campfire
Reminds me of that time I nearly
Danced into the fire
Camilla Downs, 2024

(Photo of me and my step-dad, Frank. Not camping but around the same time, early 90’s.)

**Prompt: Write a poem that features a memory of a smell.

Blood Orange Lipstick – National Poetry Month – April 12th

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April is National Poetry Month. I’m going to attempt to write one poem every day this month. Today’s poem: 12/30 – April 12th.

Blood Orange Lipstick

Having stepped out of my comfort zone
Anxious, not knowing what to expect
I entered the address into Google maps
I followed the directions, my heart racing

Once parked, I looked at myself in the rearview mirror
Checked my teeth for food
Applied lipstick
Took a deep breath
Opened the car door
Strolled across the trashy parking lot, and
Walked through the doors

Scanning everyone
I landed on the person who seemed to be in charge
I walked over, introduced myself
Telling him this is my first time,
Asking, “How does it work?”

I was warmly welcomed
I was awestruck by the poetry shared
It felt familiar
It felt safe
It felt like I fit perfectly
Like this was a room full of
Various pegs — people
All shapes and sizes
This venue a board that had a place — space, a slot for every peg — person
As I left, I knew that I must return

I did return the next Monday
And the next,
and the next
And the next

This place
This space
These people
Fill my bowl

I am welcome
Unconditionally
I’m free to be my weird
Kinky
Attention-seeking
Loud
Foul-mouthed
Flirty
Beautiful
Smiling
Hugging
Self

The space
The energy
Has allowed me
Has encouraged me
To fully blossom
To embrace
This current Camilla
For there have been many versions of Camilla
With many more versions to follow

Life is fleeting
Life is a miracle
I desire to enjoy
All life has to offer
All I feel I want to experience

I have walked onto the stage
Nearly every time I have stepped through those doors

I have observed others take a similar path
Coming for the first time
As the weeks go by
They take that leap of faith
Walking onto the stage
Sharing of themselves

It is beautiful
It is inspiring
It is witchy
It is magical
It is alchemy
Is alchemy
alchemy

That one leap of faith
Awoke something that has been asleep since 2020

Reignited my creativity
My imagination
My desire to write

That one leap of faith
Led me to say yes,
Sign me up for more poetry events
Led me to say yes to
Dating myself
Loving myself
Treating myself to live music
Taking myself out for date nights
Yes to routinely stepping out of my comfort zone

That one leap of faith
Led me to throw myself a birthday party
Surrounded by my new-found poet friends

As I approach the one year anniversary
Of this leap of faith
I reflect on my life
I’m in such a different place now
A bold
Sparkly
Edgy
Fun
New place

I took a leap of faith
I walked thorough those doors
And
It changed my life
Changed my life
My life
LIFE

I am alive
FREEDOM

Camilla Downs, 2024

**Prompt: Write a poem that involves a leap of faith, metaphorical or literal, small or big.

Hold on Loosely- National Poetry Month – April 11th

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April is National Poetry Month. I’m going to attempt to write one poem every day this month. Today’s poem: 11/30 – April 11th.

Hold on Loosely

It took strength
took strength
strength

To take these steps,
To keep going

Depart a failed marriage
Leave with a 1-year-old,
Leave with a special needs 5-year-old
Exit with all debt being in my name

Fly seven hundred and four miles,
Seattle to Reno
Knowing I would not return,
In all probability

It took strength
Took strength
Strength

To embark on the path,
The path of raising 2 kids alone

Of paying the bills,
The bills that were all in my name,
Up to the time
the money ran dry

No money, no way to make the car payment
Must return it to the bank

It took strength
Took strength
Strength

A 2 and 6-year-old with trouble handling unwelcome change
Meltdowns sure to follow
When told the car is leaving

Buy cookies
Bring out the party hats and horns
Explain we are throwing a going away party for the car
Going away party
Party

Music playing
Party hats on, horns blaring
Dancing
Partaking of cookies

Remove belongings from the car
Take photographs
Tell the car how much it meant to us
How much fun we had in it
Thank it
Wave goodbye to it

It did not take strength

It took love overcoming despair
took love overcoming despair
love overcoming despair
overcoming despair
despair

Camilla Downs 2024

Prompt: Write a poem that contradicts itself. Start by making an assertion. Then later in the poem contradict that assertion.

**This was nearly 20 years ago. It’s simply part of my history, and what came up for me when brainstorming for this prompt.**

Some Like it Hot – National Poetry Month – April 10th

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April is National Poetry Month. I’m going to attempt to write one poem every day this month. Today’s poem: 10/30 – April 10th.

Some Like it Hot

It appears to be mundane
It’s a ritual actually

Remove the lid of the hand-held manual grinder

Open the stainless steel,
matte turquoise,
airtight canister

Vital next step to follow

Inhale deeply
Instant mood uplifter

Take hold of the the shiny metal scoop
Dip into the beans, filling the scoop
Pour beans into the manual grinder

Lid back in place
Begin to turn the grinder handle
Turn, squeak
Turn, squeak
Turn, squeak

Beans are coarsely ground
Unscrew the grinder
Pour freshly ground beans
Into a smaller,
Stainless steel,
matte yellow,
airtight canister

Inhale deeply

To the percolator
Add a cup,
plus a tad more,
of reverse osmosis water
Assemble the percolator

First the filter holder
Then the filter

Scoop an overflowing mound of
Freshly ground beans
Pour into filter
Add filter cover
Close percolator

Ignite the back stove burner on the right
Turn knob to high
Place percolator on burner

Ears on high alert
Listen for the magical, gurgling music
The percolator sings

When it’s singing
Set timer for two minutes, 30 seconds

Ding
Ding
Ding

Turn burner off
Remove percolator
Transferring it to the front left burner

Large mug ready to be filled

It sits on the curved,
olive-wood cutting board,
To the left of the stove top

With my left hand
Grab the hand-made pot holder
Knitted by my oldest

Using the percolator handle
Lift it from the burner with my right hand

As I tilt to pour the dark, steaming liquid
Place the pot holder on top of the percolator
Apply pressure

Place percolator on the back left burner
Once cool
Empty and rinse
Ready for the next cup

Lift mug
Inhale deeply

Walk to the rocking chair
The one by the windows
The windows with the views
Views of the Virginia Foothills and Mt Rose

Have a seat
Hold mug
Wrap hands around mug
Warm hands

Inhale deeply

Wait for coffee to cool,
Just slightly

Sip
Scroll

Sip
Scroll

Sip
Scroll

It appears to be mundane
It’s a ritual actually

Camilla Downs, 2024

Prompt: Write a poem about something mundane that you do regularly, that you’ve never written a poem about before.

Vibing With My Thoughts – National Poetry Month – April 8th

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April is National Poetry Month. I’m going to attempt to write one poem every day this month. Today’s poem: #8 for April 8th.

Vibing With My Thoughts

Gather my thoughts you say?
Scores of racing thoughts
Each vying for attention
Each waving a red flag of urgency

Let’s take a tour
Camilla’s brain tour

ADHD is wild
A persistent flow of thoughts,
Difficult to focus on any one thought
ADHD for damn sure puts the spice in neurospicy

There’s the check with the pharmacy thought
The return the dermatologist call thought
The send those emails and texts thoughts
The did I respond to them? thoughts

The oh, keep stepping outside to view the eclipse thought

I want to write today’s poem
Yes, yes, after I eat
Oh, let me take this call from my co-worker

The distracting thought of pain from
From
From
Who knows what

Oh shit, I’ve got to help Thomas with
Their college to do list

What is that person doing outside?
Why are they doing that?

What the hell is that noise?
Takes 15 minutes investigating the noise
This brain cannot deal with random noises
Thoughts are completely derailed

Right, I’m ready to think about publishing that next book

Oh, there are Family Navigation clients
that need my attention

Wow! That’s an amazing cloud
Steps outside to take 10 photos
Of the clouds

Glancing at the plants,
Damn, the plants need water

And what is all over the floor?
I really need to vacuum.

Glances at boxes ready for items
To be returned
Shit. I need to print return labels

Sees a phrase that catches my attention
That would make a great poem
Opens notes to make a reminder of it

Sees another reminder
With unfinished thoughts
Gets distracted for 20 minutes

The bladder adds to the thoughts
It will be ignored no longer
Restroom break
Gets in the bathroom
Remberers for the hundredth time
The sink and counter need cleaned

Hey now, I know this sounds wild
To be sure, it is
I thrive with my hyper active brain
It’s good vibrations

Now imagine three of us in the
Household with the same thing
Makes for some lively conversations
Lively disagreements
I mean, lively conversations

Then there’s the thoughts
That get lost in a hidden fold of the brain
Designated as “The Corner of Lost Thoughts”

I imagine a tiny sign
With the words “enter here”
It’s divided into three sections

One section for thoughts
That will soon be remembered and recovered

Another section for thoughts
That will be remembered months later
This section is more comfortable,
With lots of food and drink
As they’ll be there for a while

The last section is a graveyard
With tiny tombstones engraved with things like,
“Here Lies Thought #222
It was important for 67 seconds
It had a lively life
Trying to get to the front of the thoughts line”
As you might have guessed
This is where thoughts go to die

On the flip side
When I’m working on something
I’m interested in
Something that lights my fire
Excites the hell out of me

I hyper focus
Deep Diving
Wrangling all other thoughts
Moving them into a holding pen
To wait their turn
While I enjoy the dopamine hits
Of working on a thought
Taking it from it’s birth to it’s ending
Giving it wings,
infusing it with knowledge
Releasing it to work its magic

Writing this poem
Any poem
Any writing
Researching something of interest
Taking actions that will
Light a fire under people’s ass
to do their damn jobs

Theses things light me on fire
Beginning with the initial sparks
The fire grows, consuming my attention
Holding my attention
With a tenacity backed and rooted
By the Gods of Tenacity themselves

Gather my thoughts, you say
I adore the way my brain works
And truly love this about myself
It’s a wild, magical ride
Camilla Downs 2024

**Prompt: from Monday Night Poetry host 2Schae: “Let me gather my thoughts”