A Piece of Myself Back – A Heart Opening Memory

**THROWBACK TO DECEMBER 14 2013 with Memories of 1989**

(I’m doing housecleaning of my blog and came across this post that got buried before I had the chance to go back to it and add more. Seemed right to share it now.)

My eyes popped open at 1:10 am. My thoughts were flooded with memories of 1989 and my first Christmas in Washington state with my Mom and Frank after moving there from Mississippi.

I vividly remembered my excitement over spending my 1st Christmas with my step-sister, Heather. Like a child in a candy shoppe choosing that perfect piece of candy, I pondered and searched for the perfect gift for her. I finally decided on a beautiful ring with an aquamarine gemstone. I put it on layaway and remember my excitement in talking with the sales clerk about who this gift was for and sharing my enthusiasm.

The day finally came when I was able to pay in full for it. I had a magical excitement as I wrapped it and wrote the perfect message to go along with it. I think my eyes were shining more than hers on Christmas day while I anxiously waited for her to open it. I don’t remember the full details of the message. It was something about how happy I was to have her in my life and that I’d always wanted a sister.

Immediately after recalling this beautiful memory early this morning, I felt as though something was gently placed back into my heart that had been missing. I will try to describe it ….

The wonder of life as a child sees it. The purity of life. The love. I thought to myself these words, “Thank you. Thank you. I had lost that somewhere along the way, hadn’t I?” Tears pooled in my eyes. I was wide awake. I then knew I must get out of my nice warm bed and write about this experience.

Something wonderful had just happened. I just got a piece of myself back. Thank you …

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My 2018 self looks back on this as a beautiful experience of my heart opening a bit when recalling this gracious memory. Although the gifts I presently give tend to be homemade and usually incorporate a poem or writing dedicated to the recipient, this was not my go to gift in 1989.

Much has shifted for me from that time. I place more value with a homemade gift than a store bought gift. I still buy store bought gifts for Thomas and Lillian. Yet, I also try to always make sure to hand make a wall hanger or card with a special message. I pour all my love and self into these home made gifts and receive incredible joy in creating them.

May you allow yourself to receive beautiful memories when they come calling and know that they have been recalled for a heart opening experience or or other love filled reason. I have also written about un-lovely memories (here and here). They each bear gifts to further our journey in this life.

(The photo of Lake Tahoe above is my idea of an incredible gem these days. I am deeply grateful to live within 30 minutes of her glory and beauty!)

Blessings,
Camilla
See It. Share It. BE IT … Spread Love Everywhere You Go!

Amazing news! My 17 year old daughter, Lillian Darnell’s debut book, “Where Would You Fly and Other Magical Stories” is published. Learn more and order here

Wonderfully exciting news! My 12 year old son, Thomas Darnell‘s book, Biggest Little Photographer is published. Be inspired! Learn more and order here.

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