Poetry and Photography: Can I Handle The Changes

Fall Leaves and Trees Vintage Lake Path with Can I Poem 12.2017

Can I?

The changes.
Create fear,
they do.

We’re all getting older,
life is not as it was.

What is this strange
thing happening?

It is true things change,
nothing stays the same.

What is happening?

Can I handle the changes?

It’s all changing
I’m changing
they are changing
nothing is as it was.

There’s no stopping
the changes.

It’s the one thing
we can be sure will
arrive – changes.

Why do the changes
create such suffering?
Why do the changes
have to be experienced
in isolation .. loneliness?

Why does one allow
the mind to create such
suffering with the changes?

Why can one not
be in the midst
of the changes.
and simply shift
one’s perspective?

That’s not how
it is anymore.
Got it.
Let’s move forward.

Why can this not be
done with releasing
that which was and is
no longer?

Why does the change
seem to have suffering
as its sidekick?

Can I handle the changes
happening in my life?

Why does one crave
sameness?

Why does one want
the comfort of
knowing how it
is to be?

Why does one
want to experience
change with
another by their side?

Can I handle the changes
of my life?

What other path
is there?

Embrace the change
Shift one’s perspective
Go with the flow
And know one is truly not alone.

or

Resist the change,
want what is no longer,
and create suffering
for oneself and those
one loves.

I know what this
heart chooses
And will never forget
what the heart will
always choose.

Every morning meditation
and in every moment
this is the place
I will attempt to Be.

Give up, I will not …..

Embrace
Shift
Go with the flow
And know.

Come my child
Let it Go.

This is the Way
of non-suffering.

-2017, Lessons from Nature

A bit of background on this writing …

I believe that everything in life stems from one of two places … Love or Fear. And difficulties with change stem from fear … fear of losing what one thought one had; when in reality it’s gone the second after it occurred.

When I wrote this I had been immersed for the last five months in the creation of Lillian’s book and getting it finished. I had not been able to go on as many walks, had not been writing as much, had not been having my solo dance parties (ha!!), and not doing my wee little yoga poses.

It has caught up with me. The one thing I would not let go of is meditating. Every morning. It has been the saving grace. I have been practicing meditation for the past 6 or 7 years and it has been truly amazing.

Don’t get me wrong, I so much enjoyed creating this book for Lillian. I really do enjoy the process. When I work on something big like this, it’s hard for me to focus on anything else. I become immersed in it with intense focus.

Most of the time I have chosen not to focus on the enormity of being a single parent. I mean truly a sole parent. No weeks or weekends with the other parent. Making all decisions alone. And homeschooling the past two years with my Mom and step-father having moved two years ago, has really added another layer to the enormity.

I had been feeling closed, disconnected, discombobulated, and weighted with a darkness … I had been in my head the past five months working on her book. Which is incredibly useful for editing, grouping, and organizing. Yet, draining when time is not taken to stay connected to the Divine heart.

So … I chose to write  and I felt so much better afterwards. Writing is therapeutic and spiritual for me. It opens my heart. Then I had a dance party! WOW!! I wrote and danced to connect and release with the humanness and felt so much better the next day! Seriously. Incredibly better.

I openly share what I am experiencing and I do this through my writings. Back in 2009, I kept getting an internal message that I was supposed to openly share my life and our family life for the benefit of others. I ignored and struggled with that for some time. I finally began to listen and have not turned back.

For I know if I am experiencing something, another is or has experienced it and what I share will be of benefit. I don’t concern myself with what others think about what I share and if it turns some away. I let that bother me and hold me back for far too long. What matters most is the person who needs to hear the messages I share.

Blessings,
Camilla
See It. Share It. BE IT … Spread Love Everywhere You Go!

Amazing news! My 16 year old daughter, Lillian Darnell’s debut book, “Where Would You Fly and Other Magical Stories” is arriving November 2017. Learn more and order here

Wonderfully exciting news! My 12 year old son, Thomas Darnell‘s book, Biggest Little Photographer is published. Be inspired! Learn more and order here.

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